Giveaway: Pathfinder Arms Armor - give me your shit in return

NaffNaffBobFace

Space Marshal
Donor
Jan 5, 2016
11,755
43,213
3,150
RSI Handle
NaffNaffBobFace
And we have a winning entry. Congratz! Thx everyone for your contributions. Interestingly most of you took the term "shitpost" quite literally 😁

@NaffNaffBobFace

Your awful but creative poetic talent got you a well deserved prize of random weirdo arms! Please let me know whether you want to claim it or have it passed on to another lucky soul 🙃
Many thanks and cheers to everyone for the kind votes. As stated in the poem I respectfully decline the kind prize of some random weirdo arms, please pass on to the second highest scoring shit-post.
 
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Ploeperpengel

Space Marshal
Jun 17, 2018
407
1,363
1,800
RSI Handle
Sadis
I had Chinese food recently and after a long struggle to get to the toilet I made it, only to realize I still had my pants on. I moved to release the belt and as I did I felt it. It was as if Jesus himself parted my cheeks and forced his way out to the as-of-then clean water of the toilet. That day I experienced the benevolent might of our Dear Leader as I cried out to the God Emperor Montoya for protection from the coming storm. Ripping my jeans off with a spurt of herculean strength I pulled an Iraqi Squat and the battle began. My insides declared themselves wretched and impure as a stream of molten decay and processed matter slammed like an Idris' beam weapon into the waiting abyss. Forty minutes I spent clinging to sanity like a newborn clutching a tit, near tears I could only see the glass of the mirror grow dark as pain clouded my vision.

That Spicy Shredded Beef was worth every minute of suffering. It will not be the last battle, but it will be remembered none the less for it.
As @NaffNaffBobFace requested the prize shall go to the creator of the shitpost with the second most likes in his stead. And what a shitpost it is! @Wolfy will you be so kind and relieve me of these weirdly purplish bracelets that will perfectly camouflage you in a field of lavender?
 
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Wolfy

Space Kitty
Donor
Apr 27, 2017
2,186
8,581
2,860
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WolfytheWarlock
As @NaffNaffBobFace requested the prize shall go to the creator of the shitpost with the second most likes in his stead. And what a shitpost it is! @Wolfy will you be so kind and relieve me of these weirdly purplish bracelets that will perfectly camouflage you in a field of lavender?
In memory of my struggle to shit I accept them.
 

Ploeperpengel

Space Marshal
Jun 17, 2018
407
1,363
1,800
RSI Handle
Sadis
More is on the way, next will be a lovely story of my attempt to watch the sunrise over Loreville from my 600I while afflicted by Terra Mills' Prallies. (Yes I have spent time researching potential foods in lore for shitposting)
May your lavender armor allways protect you from nasty smells! 😉
 
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