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I'm awake!

Don't be embarrassed. Even super-soldiers have parents. I was in Basic Training during a Mother's Day, so after a three-hour sleep and a 10 mile run and a gazillion push-ups, our Drill Sergeant made us all write nice letters to our mothers. I bet my mom still has it somewhere...

@Grimbli spotted around page 250! He's going to make it! Go, Grimbli! Go!

:100: is actually a pink toilet seat with two pink cheeks.

I think it's full of mind-control nano-robots. When Chris Roberts announces that Star Citizen has been scrubbed in favor of TEST Citizen, we'll know he drank it.

I did not read this and then I liked it.

When I joined, I was 22. Within a week, my nickname was "Grandpa." @CrudeSasquatch 's fellow recruits are going to think he's a Sergeant Major who got busted down to Private! :laughing:

Must maintain optimal efficiency! View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkikWCaoKK4 (I can't tell if this is satire or real...?)

Happy news! Best wishes! Wedding beverage? Why not beer?

Have fun, @CrudeSasquatch . This belongs here more than the other thread. Intel reports from the future! @CrudeSasquatch , now shaved to adhere to regulations, kept warm by his yeti heart, defending Canada bravely! :flag_ca: Go get those hosers! :flag_ca:

This one was too good to not post. New intel from the future: @CrudeSasquatch in action!

Yeah, I wasn't referring to getting married... just to why the Army would give you a nurse...

Uhm... you don't want an Army issued nurse either... for reasons I should not go in to in a shitpost thread.

Listen to your brother, @CrudeSasquatch . That should be the last thing on your mind. This is where your mind should be: one foot in front of the other, in front of the other, in front of the other...

Are you sure? This was first result: You bigfoots clean up well once you've shaved.

Now that I have replied, you cannot edit this post and will be held to this promise. I'm off to make 50 new spai accounts.