NSFW disturbing occurrence while hanging the washing out.

NaffNaffBobFace

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Hi, witnessing the following made my face do this, so if you are at work or not up for your face doing this, stop reading now:

This Face.JPG

So....

Mrs. 'BobFace is in the family way busy making us a baby/new co-pilot for TEST, and was feeling a bit poopy. She mentions she wants to bring the dry washing in from the line and hang the wet washing back out. I offer to do it because feeling bad is bad, and pop a sunhat and shades on because the sun is relentless today and going outside without some form of environmental armor is to be discouraged at every possible opportunity.

I bring the dry washing in with no issues, fill the basket from the washing machine. A few bits and pieces go onto the line, I spend far too long trying to work out how to hang a dress on it as the thing seemed to defy the laws of physics in its ability to turn inside-out by just turning it upside down, and suddenly out of the corner of my eye I register movement.

My eyes dart sideways to the second story window of one of the houses that overlook the garden. It's a bathroom window.

A guy is inside, with one foot on the inside windowsill that has assorted bathroom bottles and what I assume is a mirror on it, in nothing but a pair of underwear. He is stood on the sill to get enough height to jam his head into the little gap you get when you open little window at the top of a bathroom window - his eyes are the only part that are clearly visible as the window glass is thankfully frosted, but it's obvious from the pumping motion at groin level: he's pleasuring himself.

He's not looking into my garden which his house overlooks from the left, but off down the side of the houses into one of the neighbors gardens. I can't see whats down there but my guess is someone sunbathing.

I have no idea what to do... so continue hanging out the washing... shortly before the last garment goes on the line, it occurs to me to cough loudly to make him aware there's more than just him in the world. I look round from affixing the last peg and he's backed off from the window, but through the frosted glass he's not backed off far enough to obscure his pink form - he's still there, clearly pumping away, this time his head tilted in such a way to suggest he was looking into what I had assumed was the mirror.

I walk into the house, take off the sunhat, and remove my shades in a "Mother Of God" meme way and can only say:

"I just saw a guy tossing it off."

Mrs. 'BobFace pauses for a moment then replies "What?"

I'm almost lost for words.

"There's a guy in the bathroom window of one of the overlooking houses... tossing."

I explain the original stance, the cough and his slight but not total retreat.

She gets up from the chair and comes to the back door and sees.

"I bet one of the neighbors is topless sunbathing" she says aghast.

We dart upstairs to the only window we have that overlooks the gardens he had been staring at down the side of our house. There was a lady neighbor sat in the sun dressed in a baiting suit, reading a book.

"What a pervert." Says Mrs. 'BobFace.

"Dirty bastard." I agree.

"I'm calling him out on Facebook!" She cries with glee.

"Er... what? Perhaps not...?" I can only imagine the ways this could blow up in the local community if it went on Facebook "Plus you'd need evidence and we don't have a video of it."

"Recording that is almost as pervy as doing it" she agrees.

We run back down stairs, I sneak a peek out the back door and his figure through the frosted glass has finally, thankfully, stopped grinding his groin... but now appears to be dabbing at what I thought was a mirror before finally vanishing...

"This," I said to Mrs. 'BobFace "Is the reason why I don't, generally, hang the washing out."

I then had to spend the next five minutes talking Mrs. 'Bobface out of sharing it with the world as at this point she was riling to go round and knock on his door... Then I came to TEST and shared it here instead.

Apart from logging it as evidence for the day the guy does something truly creepy, what are you supposed to do when you see something like this?

EDIT - If this is too gross for TEST, please remove with my blessing.
 
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NaffNaffBobFace

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Maybe talk to the sunbather?
It could be quite embarrassing for her to put that on social media.
We're definitely not touching any form of social media with this at all, as stated I could imagine how it could all blow up so that's definitely not happening.

The neighbors along that line are passing hellos not known by name and we don't know the guy at all, so i'm all up for dropping it, but... yeah that's some creepy stuff.
 
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NaffNaffBobFace

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I would not be so quick to assume you knew what he was doing.

It his highly likely he was simply washing the dishes.

Thank you Glorious Leader!

The good Mrs. 'BobFace did hypothesize that perhaps he was washing a glass shower door as his hand movements were very vigorous... It would also explain the dabbing of the mirror at the end too, perhaps he had got some suds on it?
 

maynard

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True story

Back in the day my grandparents had a beachfront winter home in Florida. When she was a teenager my mother and her sisters used to sunbathe au naturel on the flat roof during their Christmas and Easter breaks. One day a T6 from the Naval Base nearby flew over. The girls waved, and the pilot waggled his wings in reply. In no time at all there was a steady stream of trainees overflying the house hoping for a glimpse of the girls.

When my mother related the story I thought to myself, " You were a bold one, weren't you?" Then she told us they would go to the Friday night USO dances on the base to see who would recognise them...
 

Blind Owl

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Nov 27, 2015
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True story

Back in the day my grandparents had a beachfront winter home in Florida. When she was a teenager my mother and her sisters used to sunbathe au naturel on the flat roof during their Christmas and Easter breaks. One day a T6 from the Naval Base nearby flew over. The girls waved, and the pilot waggled his wings in reply. In no time at all there was a steady stream of trainees overflying the house hoping for a glimpse of the girls.

When my mother related the story I thought to myself, " You were a bold one, weren't you?" Then she told us they would go to the Friday night USO dances on the base to see who would recognise them...
You're dad wasn't perhaps navy, was he?
 

Lorddarthvik

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Feb 22, 2016
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Hi, witnessing the following made my face do this, so if you are at work or not up for your face doing this, stop reading now:

View attachment 12513

So....

Mrs. 'BobFace is in the family way busy making us a baby/new co-pilot for TEST, and was feeling a bit poopy. She mentions she wants to bring the dry washing in from the line and hang the wet washing back out. I offer to do it because feeling bad is bad, and pop a sunhat and shades on because the sun is relentless today and going outside without some form of environmental armor is to be discouraged at every possible opportunity.

I bring the dry washing in with no issues, fill the basket from the washing machine. A few bits and pieces go onto the line, I spend far too long trying to work out how to hang a dress on it as the thing seemed to defy the laws of physics in its ability to turn inside-out by just turning it upside down, and suddenly out of the corner of my eye I register movement.

My eyes dart sideways to the second story window of one of the houses that overlook the garden. It's a bathroom window.

A guy is inside, with one foot on the inside windowsill that has assorted bathroom bottles and what I assume is a mirror on it, in nothing but a pair of underwear. He is stood on the sill to get enough height to jam his head into the little gap you get when you open little window at the top of a bathroom window - his eyes are the only part that are clearly visible as the window glass is thankfully frosted, but it's obvious from the pumping motion at groin level: he's pleasuring himself.

He's not looking into my garden which his house overlooks from the left, but off down the side of the houses into one of the neighbors gardens. I can't see whats down there but my guess is someone sunbathing.

I have no idea what to do... so continue hanging out the washing... shortly before the last garment goes on the line, it occurs to me to cough loudly to make him aware there's more than just him in the world. I look round from affixing the last peg and he's backed off from the window, but through the frosted glass he's not backed off far enough to obscure his pink form - he's still there, clearly pumping away, this time his head tilted in such a way to suggest he was looking into what I had assumed was the mirror.

I walk into the house, take off the sunhat, and remove my shades in a "Mother Of God" meme way and can only say:

"I just saw a guy tossing it off."

Mrs. 'BobFace pauses for a moment then replies "What?"

I'm almost lost for words.

"There's a guy in the bathroom window of one of the overlooking houses... tossing."

I explain the original stance, the cough and his slight but not total retreat.

She gets up from the chair and comes to the back door and sees.

"I bet one of the neighbors is topless sunbathing" she says aghast.

We dart upstairs to the only window we have that overlooks the gardens he had been staring at down the side of our house. There was a lady neighbor sat in the sun dressed in a baiting suit, reading a book.

"What a pervert." Says Mrs. 'BobFace.

"Dirty bastard." I agree.

"I'm calling him out on Facebook!" She cries with glee.

"Er... what? Perhaps not...?" I can only imagine the ways this could blow up in the local community if it went on Facebook "Plus you'd need evidence and we don't have a video of it."

"Recording that is almost as pervy as doing it" she agrees.

We run back down stairs, I sneak a peek out the back door and his figure through the frosted glass has finally, thankfully, stopped grinding his groin... but now appears to be dabbing at what I thought was a mirror before finally vanishing...

"This," I said to Mrs. 'BobFace "Is the reason why I don't, generally, hang the washing out."

I then had to spend the next five minutes talking Mrs. 'Bobface out of sharing it with the world as at this point she was riling to go round and knock on his door... Then I came to TEST and shared it here instead.

Apart from logging it as evidence for the day the guy does something truly creepy, what are you supposed to do when you see something like this?

EDIT - If this is too gross for TEST, please remove with my blessing.
If I were to fabricate a plausible lie, I'd say he was using a nail-brush (or nylon brush or whatever it's called in English) vigorously to clean his fabric shoes that got covered in the mix of regurgitated beer, whiskey and pizza during last night's party. He was careless and got in his vigor, got some of the suds flying all over the place, hitting the mirror, thus it had to be dabbed clean.

What occams razor says though is the more likely version:
Yeah, he was jerkin it to the neighbor.
 

Vavrik

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I just wanted to wish you and the Mrs well with the offspring. You could have borrowed one of mine for a while. Especially the youngest. He's 17 and will eat you and at least 2 neighbors out of house and home, but he can also take care of yards, do laundry and take care of interior painting. He's also almost toilet trained.
 

NaffNaffBobFace

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I just wanted to wish you and the Mrs well with the offspring. You could have borrowed one of mine for a while. Especially the youngest. He's 17 and will eat you and at least 2 neighbors out of house and home, but he can also take care of yards, do laundry and take care of interior painting. He's also almost toilet trained.
Many thanks Vavrik, much appreciated. I got Mrs. 'Bobface a Mothers Day card from Bump which has a picture of a baby sat in a sink holding a plate and inside wrote "I'll only show dad how to do the dishes ONCE"

She cried, but I'm not sure if it was through joy or despair 🙂
 

Vavrik

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She cried, but I'm not sure if it was through joy or despair
Depends how far along. The closer it gets the closer to despair it gets. Just wait till she's in delivery, your name will be something that resembles dark mud. Best advice I have.... weather it like a man, both the up times, and the down times. It's worth every second, and she won't remember much anyway, unless you don't weather it like a man. Then she'll remember every second, and how much she wanted to tear your member in half. No pressure.

But don't worry. This is a well known process, billions have come before you. It's also the beginning of the most important job of your life.
 

NaffNaffBobFace

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Depends how far along. The closer it gets the closer to despair it gets. Just wait till she's in delivery, your name will be something that resembles dark mud. Best advice I have.... weather it like a man, both the up times, and the down times. It's worth every second, and she won't remember much anyway, unless you don't weather it like a man. Then she'll remember every second, and how much she wanted to tear your member in half. No pressure.

But don't worry. This is a well known process, billions have come before you. It's also the beginning of the most important job of your life.
Genuine thanks for the advice 🙂

Mrs. 'BobFace has been known to hold a grudge so if I fail her in the delivery room I may as well apply for that one-way ticket to Mars.
 
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