A little Derek Smart Copy-Pasta

ThomSirveaux

Space Marshal
Sep 12, 2014
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Thom_Sirveaux
So, here's a little musing I did on r/DerekSmart about the only scenario in which he would ever download the game:

Derek wakes up from a wicked bender the night before. His keyboard covered in a mixture of vomit and what can only be described as "Soylent purple". Where it comes from, not even the man himself knows. The sun shines brightly through the large glass windows of his rented condo, making him blink it away as he stumbles to close the blinds. A strange ringing in his ears begins to grow as he stifles down a bit of vomit, swallowing it out of spite.

The ringing grows louder and louder, making him search frantically for the source. Finally, he turns back to his computer in horror as the ringing becomes a soft melody of symphonic music, swelling with pride at each distinct overture. "No... I couldn't have..." He says to himself, desperately trying to rewrite the narrative normally racing around his brain.

His hands find the desk, smacking it full force, causing his monitors to wobble, the pool of vomit giggling obscenely. With a single motion, all but a single screen was swept from the wood and glass furniture, the speakers flying in two different directions, still playing the fanciful tune. The man begins to weep, sobbing as he curls into the fetal position, clutching his knees as he rocks back and forth.

The screen bustles with activity, players running around Arc Corp, waiving, emoting, typing messages to each other while other still zoom around in their buggies. The attention to detail was amazing; the lighting sublime, with the absolute perfect sound effects to accompany what was happening before him.

He was beaten, and in a moment of weakness, gave in and enjoyed what was to be the dagger through his heart. Deep down, he realized that he was inferior. He knew nothing he would ever do would equal the beauty before him.
Enjoy
 

Rainshine

Captain
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Nov 13, 2014
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RainingLight
Go read his twitter feed. It's almost sad. He's so genuinely disconnected from reality, I believe there is actually something wrong with him. This is totally not a jab at him, I think he actually believes what he's saying but damn...this dude is both completely full of himself and monumentally deranged concerning how excellent the game actually is.

I mean, I have to sympathize with him a little. He has been in the industry for decades and not seen much success, then CR comes BACK to the industry after being absent for years and is about to DOMINATE it, both from a playerbase and technological standpoint...it must be a massive stab to what little pride he has left.
 
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ThomSirveaux

Space Marshal
Sep 12, 2014
1,162
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2,670
RSI Handle
Thom_Sirveaux
Go read his twitter feed. It's almost sad. He's so genuinely disconnected from reality, I believe there is actually something wrong with him. This is totally not a jab at him, I think he actually believes what he's saying but damn...this dude is both completely full of himself and monumentally deranged concerning how excellent the game actually is.

I mean, I have to sympathize with him a little. He has been in the industry for decades and not seen much success, then CR comes BACK to the industry after being absent for years and is about to DOMINATE it, both from a playerbase and technological standpoint...it must be a massive stab to what little pride he has left.
I know people like him. It's really sad, actually, when you realize just what/who they are. One of my good friends from high school turned out a bit like this, though he came from a pretty well off family, was able to get a job with his dad working "in the industry" (Fox Sports), but he crashed and burned because his personality clashed with, well, everyone. If you had a differing opinion, then you were an idiot and didn't know what you were talking about.

It's the hallmark of an egotist. They cannot, absolutely cannot abide by anyone being better than they are. They can have f@#$-all talent, be absolutely useless regardless of their own self-image, but if someone comes by with genuine ability, they start attacking. It's funny and sad, and a little unsettling, how these people completely operate out of their own little worlds.

I hold no sympathy for Mr. Smart, as he acts like a child who wants what another kid has, and will yell and scream and throw a tantrum until they get it. Granted, some of his points (well, maybe one or two) are valid, but big-picture, he is blindfolded, throwing darts at the wall to see what sticks. He doesn't realize, however, that his darts have no points...
 
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