charlie charlie one - fellow pew professionals

Is this proposition:

  • Outcome B - You are a throbber of the highest order, this will never work.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    11

Faenrir

Lieutenant
Mar 22, 2015
13
7
75
RSI Handle
Faenrir
Denizens of the TESTicular community, may I present to you:

The Vision:

Imagine - if you will - a band of speshul operators operating operationally in the operating environment. Posing more of a danger to themselves than anybody else - this band of brothers romp their way across the universe. Fuelled by an unstoppable concoction of hard liquor, harder coffee and some serious protein shakes - they represent the best (?) their nations had / have to offer. Trained at extreme expense by their respective governments - they know the fear of the RSM and his dress regs and they know pain of sentry duty in the twilight hours.

Maybe you're a spec ops hitter, maybe you're a Loggie who cleans the shitter - we all know military types do it better. When the shit hits the fan and you absolutely, positively have to depend on somebody pulling you out of that big pile of shit that you've landed in - you know you can rely on your fellow serviceman to lovingly fuck you in the ass in your time of need.

Intent:

What I'm proposing here - if there are any other past or present members of the armed forces - is a community us who can be called upon to occasionally come together to attempt missions so WTF in their inception that no civvie would ever contemplate them.

Led by the fearless yet navigationally challenged officer class - this elite collection of men and women turn J2 analysis into J3 effects. The very embodiment of Mr Muscle - they love the jobs you hate. If there's a tasking deemed too retarded even for conventional TESTicles - maybe, just maybe - a crew of pew professionals might just get the job done.

Lets assume there is a task to be accomplished. Maybe it involves dropping some bad guys. Maybe it involves the reconnaissance of a difficult target. Maybe it requires logistical planning, intelligence preparation, institutional drinking and cross dressing. Whatever the target set, you can depend on those of us in the forces to turn it into such an exceptional clusterfuck that no opposing force could handle - all done with immaculate voice procedure.

If nothing else it would be an opportunity to take the piss out of each other and share a laugh with fellow servicemen and women in a way that only those in the military can.

My computer doesn't even run Star Citizen so I don't know how this would work out in reality but as someone once said - I have a dream.

Execution:

Step one requires the analysis of this concept and a conclusion be achieved. There can be only two outcomes:

Outcome A - What an awesome idea - Keep calm and Operate on.

Outcome B - This idea is beyond retarded - Get back in your box you silly fucker.

Upon verification of Outcome B - I'll severely chastise myself and continue crashing my Aurora into asteroids.

However, if enough alcohol has been consumed and Outcome A is verified - the journey continues.

Step two in this journey requires the identification of suitable individuals ready and willing to volunteer for speshulist duties. I'm open to suggestions on pre-requisites but I'd suggest some level of service as a base requirement. What's that..? Oh you're in an airsoft special forces delta seal ranger team trained by the SAS? Sorry buddy, I'm sure you are a total BB badass but you ain't coming in.

So are you serving or have you served - even the RAF Regiment could be considered...

Obviously don't be a twat and blow your OPSEC but it would be good to know if there are likeminded individuals out there - and who knows - maybe an elite squad of pen pushing army clerks, air force munitions specialists and navy seals posing as chefs will collectively malinger their way to victory in the name of TEST.

Step three - Lets achieve steps one and two first and then collectively push this turd of an idea through to those in the dizzying heights of leadership.

Keep calm and operate on - till Valhalla brothers.
 
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maynard

Space Marshal
May 20, 2014
5,124
20,290
2,995
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mgk
what missions can you imagine in the PU that civvies would shy from?

the danger is virtual, amirite?
 

Voices

Space Marshal
Mar 14, 2015
14
14
2,185
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Voices058
this is crazy... but call me maybe....for reporting in possibly....
 

Faenrir

Lieutenant
Mar 22, 2015
13
7
75
RSI Handle
Faenrir
Don't think I said that civvies would shy away from anything - what I said was that the forces community could on occasion come together to attempt missions so WTF in their inception that no civvie would ever contemplate them.

Misadventures such as the games of Freckles, Soggy Biscuit and Human Kerplunk all originate from the minds of squaddies.

The level of devious creativity most soldiers acquire during a career of 98% boredom and 2% shit my pants WTF is simply staggering and should not be underestimated - all I'm suggesting is that this be harnessed for the good of all.

Unless of course I've underestimated my fellow TESTers and this is a whole community of perverse weirdo's who would give any mortar platoon a run for it's money!
 

mindfart

Space Marshal
Donor
Feb 10, 2015
585
1,785
2,610
RSI Handle
mindfart
Unless of course I've underestimated my fellow TESTers and this is a whole community of perverse weirdo's who would give any mortar platoon a run for it's money!
wow, wait what? are you high or something?
 
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