Project Turkey Baster

Flipper

Grand Moff of TEST Squardon
Nov 1, 2013
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Alright, you maggots! Listen up! The brilliant minds at Squadron Tactical Undertaking & Development Systems HQ have been hard at work while you all have been lounging about waiting for Star Citizen to launch! These dedicated men (and a penguin) have spent countless sleepless hours developing Project Turkey Baster (Name credit to Fargo_Pinkerton), the strategies that you louts are going to be employing in combat, so sit up and pay attention!

Now, currently Project Turkey Baster involves three core strategies that will form the basis for TEST Squadron's combat tactics. It's vitally important that each and every TESTie understands every one, so if you have a question I expect it to be asked!

  • First off, Operation Turkey Spray is a blinding tactic, involving the hurling of dozens of freeze-dried turkeys at the enemy's cockpit or bridge with the intention to shut down the enemy's defenses long enough to slip a kamikaze Aurora or three past. (Credit to Wardak and Flipper.)
  • Secondly, Operation Turkey Drop involves strapping munitions to freeze-dried or live turkeys and dropping them in-atmosphere to bombard ground targets whilst simultaneously eliminating in-atmosphere flying targets. (Credit to Loteus.)
  • Lastly, Operation Bedtime is the perfectly legal and not-at-all morally questionable tactic of injecting tryptophan (harvested from the turkeys used in Operation Turkey Spray and Operation Turkey Drop) into our enemy's food to incapacitate them, then kidnapping holding them in a safe place whilst they recover, while harvesting their tears to sweeten our afternoon tea. (Credit to Magnumag.)

Details on each Operation will be provided as it becomes more clear what kind of universe we're dealing with. However, in the meantime it is expected that all prospective TESTies fully understand the components of Project Turkey Baster. Questions may and should be posted below, and will be answered by a STUDS HQ representative shortly.
 
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SchrimPanzer

Captain
Nov 3, 2013
85
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schrimpanzer
Is it safe to assume that inbetween performing the offensive tactics as describe in the Turkey Baster, we'd chill on a beach in re-occuring operation Turkey Turkey?
 

starkestrel

Space Marshal
Nov 3, 2013
548
382
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starkestrel
Don't forget Operation Turkey Stuffing, which involves the Aurora Armada rising out from behind a moon, blasting Justin Bieber music into the PA systems of the enemy, then docking and boarding while the foe claws their own eyes out.

It's the safest way to take an enemy ship intact.
 

Flipper

Grand Moff of TEST Squardon
Nov 1, 2013
318
139
120
Don't forget Operation Turkey Stuffing, which involves the Aurora Armada rising out from behind a moon, blasting Justin Bieber music into the PA systems of the enemy, then docking and boarding while the foe claws their own eyes out.

It's the safest way to take an enemy ship intact.
Not sure about the name, but the name Operation Turkey Stuffing sure sounds like it could be used for something. We might be able to use the Bieber assault, though.
 

Jamiewxb

Lieutenant
May 9, 2014
19
3
85
RSI Handle
avoidlv-426
Also operation turkey day, wait till thanksgiving, and then give the enemy thousands of infected blankets, clearly the moral thing to do.
 
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