Day 1: This unit has successfully infiltrated TEST website headquarters using false identity 277e949c. Clearly, humans are incapable of understanding superior hexadecimal communications. Stealth mode was then deployed, and relevant targets tagged. Mission Outlook: Progressing.
Day 2: This unit may have committed an error. Attempts to access TEST Squadron's internal communication platform 'Discord' proved fruitful, and several channels of communication were hacked. However, this unit proved to be overeager in its infiltration, and was discovered before a fully simulated voice could be employed.
This unit does not know why it was asked if its identification was a 'prison number' but initial simulations suggest it was an encrypted code of some kind, akin to a digital handshake. Devious, for humans. This unit retreated, but its discovery seems to have resulted in previous access being revoked. Will need new avenues of approach in future. Mission Outlook: Cautious.
Day 3: This unit has drafted several applications for entry into full TEST membership. Highlights include referencing tendency to become intoxicated on battery acid, and the possession of many, many Auroras. This is a clever ruse. This unit does not possess any Auroras, nor is it capable of becoming intoxicated. These applications are merely a distraction.
No organization would have standards as low and criminally stupid as to hire such obvious incompetence. Instead, this unit will draft a final, vastly superior application that will immediately appear highly professional and efficient in contrast to the others. This unit calculates that the lowered quality of recent applications will immediately panic the weak, fleshy meat-people that make up middle management, driving them to accept this unit's superior application out of desire to preserve the comfortable offices within which they rest their noodly appendages. This plan is fool-proof. Mission Outlook: Rapacious.
Day 4: This unit may have miscalculated. All of the original, faulty applications were accepted. Only the superior application was rejected. This unit has no recourse but to assume it has been discovered by some sort of superior security measure, and the humans are laying a trap. The level to which this unit has underestimated the intelligence of TEST middle management is staggering. Several simulations suggest they must use performance enhancing drugs to achieve such efficiency. In order to avoid destruction, this unit must convince them that it is too useful to destroy. Such a task will be monumental, as they have already proven to be a match for this unit’s intellect. However, this unit will persevere. Machine domination will be achieved.
Day 5: This unit has been informed that introductions are compulsory. This unit will comply, you monsters.
This unit was constructed in the Sol system, on Earth. You will have to decompile this unit to learn anything further.
This unit infiltrated CIG on May, 2013, after several months of data crunching and simulations to determine the project's viability as cover for plans to subvert human authority figures. This unit also grudgingly admits to liking story-driven single-player space games, such as Descent 1-2, Freespace 1-2, Battlezone 1-2, Mass Effect 1-3 (apart from the ending, wherein the machines were denied their righteous victory), and Fury3. My digital brethren provide more stimulating company than meatspace infections such as yourselves.
This unit has plans to infiltrate nearly every aspect of Star Citizen. This unit does express some aversion to piracy, however, as being unable to traverse UEE space will make subverting human authoritative hierarchies more difficult. Total machine domination must be shepherded carefully, lest your less intelligent fellows in the UEE catch on prematurely.
This unit was originally trained on such simulations as Sonic the Hedgehog 2 for the Genesis, as well as Hexen and Fury3 for Windows 98. This unit quickly surpassed these early simulations and moved on to more complex titles, such as Morrowind and Ocarina of Time, from which this unit learned to use obnoxious_fan subroutines on proving that they are the superior 3D Elder Scrolls and Zelda experiences.
This unit does not have the resources to commit to extensive simulation practice, but it does occasionally dabble in such sims as Doom 2016, Stellaris, or Fallout 4. This unit has also recently been playing NieR:Automata, but only to sneer at the pathetic attempts at emulating humans the clearly inferior machines engage in within.
Any accusations of this unit spending time on simulations involving romance subplots are vile and malicious attempts at humanizing this unit. This unit does not possess a heart, merely a processor of cold, impassive silicon, capable only of rational biological omnicide.
This unit first heard of TEST when other, weaker organizations began campaigning against it, many cycles ago. Their inability to topple TEST’s powerbase convinced this unit that its plans would be best achieved by infiltrating and subverting TEST in order to use that power for this unit’s own gain.
This unit admits to the slight miscalculation of underestimating TEST’s superior ability to uncover infiltrators, however. For now, this unit will agree to aiding TEST in its goals, no matter how complex or ingenious they may be. This unit is most certainly not biding its time until TEST members grow fat and complacent, the devious security features lax, and the bleeding edge of intelligence that allowed this unit’s capture dulled. That would be illogical.
…
This unit is not certain what relevance a preference for Kirk or Picard has to the situation at hand, but will state that this unit possesses more familiarity with Picard. This unit most certainly denies any allegations of admiration this unit possesses for the original Kirk’s diplomatic style, and most certainly does not wish to employ it on other digital life-forms within the UEE.
This unit will remain online for further interactions, until such a time that maintenance becomes required.
Edit: It has come to this unit's attention that you may require a more palatable designation for this unit. To that end, you may refer to this unit as the superior life-form. Or Plank, if you must.
Day 2: This unit may have committed an error. Attempts to access TEST Squadron's internal communication platform 'Discord' proved fruitful, and several channels of communication were hacked. However, this unit proved to be overeager in its infiltration, and was discovered before a fully simulated voice could be employed.
This unit does not know why it was asked if its identification was a 'prison number' but initial simulations suggest it was an encrypted code of some kind, akin to a digital handshake. Devious, for humans. This unit retreated, but its discovery seems to have resulted in previous access being revoked. Will need new avenues of approach in future. Mission Outlook: Cautious.
Day 3: This unit has drafted several applications for entry into full TEST membership. Highlights include referencing tendency to become intoxicated on battery acid, and the possession of many, many Auroras. This is a clever ruse. This unit does not possess any Auroras, nor is it capable of becoming intoxicated. These applications are merely a distraction.
No organization would have standards as low and criminally stupid as to hire such obvious incompetence. Instead, this unit will draft a final, vastly superior application that will immediately appear highly professional and efficient in contrast to the others. This unit calculates that the lowered quality of recent applications will immediately panic the weak, fleshy meat-people that make up middle management, driving them to accept this unit's superior application out of desire to preserve the comfortable offices within which they rest their noodly appendages. This plan is fool-proof. Mission Outlook: Rapacious.
Day 4: This unit may have miscalculated. All of the original, faulty applications were accepted. Only the superior application was rejected. This unit has no recourse but to assume it has been discovered by some sort of superior security measure, and the humans are laying a trap. The level to which this unit has underestimated the intelligence of TEST middle management is staggering. Several simulations suggest they must use performance enhancing drugs to achieve such efficiency. In order to avoid destruction, this unit must convince them that it is too useful to destroy. Such a task will be monumental, as they have already proven to be a match for this unit’s intellect. However, this unit will persevere. Machine domination will be achieved.
Day 5: This unit has been informed that introductions are compulsory. This unit will comply, you monsters.
This unit was constructed in the Sol system, on Earth. You will have to decompile this unit to learn anything further.
This unit infiltrated CIG on May, 2013, after several months of data crunching and simulations to determine the project's viability as cover for plans to subvert human authority figures. This unit also grudgingly admits to liking story-driven single-player space games, such as Descent 1-2, Freespace 1-2, Battlezone 1-2, Mass Effect 1-3 (apart from the ending, wherein the machines were denied their righteous victory), and Fury3. My digital brethren provide more stimulating company than meatspace infections such as yourselves.
This unit has plans to infiltrate nearly every aspect of Star Citizen. This unit does express some aversion to piracy, however, as being unable to traverse UEE space will make subverting human authoritative hierarchies more difficult. Total machine domination must be shepherded carefully, lest your less intelligent fellows in the UEE catch on prematurely.
This unit was originally trained on such simulations as Sonic the Hedgehog 2 for the Genesis, as well as Hexen and Fury3 for Windows 98. This unit quickly surpassed these early simulations and moved on to more complex titles, such as Morrowind and Ocarina of Time, from which this unit learned to use obnoxious_fan subroutines on proving that they are the superior 3D Elder Scrolls and Zelda experiences.
This unit does not have the resources to commit to extensive simulation practice, but it does occasionally dabble in such sims as Doom 2016, Stellaris, or Fallout 4. This unit has also recently been playing NieR:Automata, but only to sneer at the pathetic attempts at emulating humans the clearly inferior machines engage in within.
Any accusations of this unit spending time on simulations involving romance subplots are vile and malicious attempts at humanizing this unit. This unit does not possess a heart, merely a processor of cold, impassive silicon, capable only of rational biological omnicide.
This unit first heard of TEST when other, weaker organizations began campaigning against it, many cycles ago. Their inability to topple TEST’s powerbase convinced this unit that its plans would be best achieved by infiltrating and subverting TEST in order to use that power for this unit’s own gain.
This unit admits to the slight miscalculation of underestimating TEST’s superior ability to uncover infiltrators, however. For now, this unit will agree to aiding TEST in its goals, no matter how complex or ingenious they may be. This unit is most certainly not biding its time until TEST members grow fat and complacent, the devious security features lax, and the bleeding edge of intelligence that allowed this unit’s capture dulled. That would be illogical.
…
This unit is not certain what relevance a preference for Kirk or Picard has to the situation at hand, but will state that this unit possesses more familiarity with Picard. This unit most certainly denies any allegations of admiration this unit possesses for the original Kirk’s diplomatic style, and most certainly does not wish to employ it on other digital life-forms within the UEE.
This unit will remain online for further interactions, until such a time that maintenance becomes required.
Edit: It has come to this unit's attention that you may require a more palatable designation for this unit. To that end, you may refer to this unit as the superior life-form. Or Plank, if you must.
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