ATTENTION ALL TESTIES
BY THE POWER VESTED IN ME BY THE GLORY OF MONTOYA'S NIPPLES (MAY THEY REMAIN HARD AND RESOLUTE) I HEREBY PRESENT TO YOU, THE LATEST AND GREATEST IN COUNTER-SPAM INVITE WARFARE. USE IT WITH GREAT JUSTICE, AND WITH NO MERCY FOR SPAMMERS. HEAR THE WEEPING AND GNASHING OF TEETH FROM XPLOR, SERENITY, AND THE GREAT UNCLEAN ONE: THE CORPORATION!
BEHOLD!
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little citizen? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the UEE Marines, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Vanduul, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in Xi’an warfare and I’m the top pilot in the entire UEE armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this ‘Verse, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the CommNet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the ‘Verse and your MobiGlass is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the TEST Squadron Elite Delta Force Recon Ranger Spooky Commandoes and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the universe, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” organization invitation was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, carebear.