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I know, right?! Fair food prices, good attraction maps, and the SLUTTIEST of woodland creatures.

Paragraph six, section four of the very same contract dictates that; In the event of a natural disaster, our glorious leader Montoya is to deliver life-saving fellatio to the penguins at the San Diego zoo. I didn't see our glorious leader down there after the last earthquake, so why should I...

Spoiler alert: It gets cancelled.

Nice try, filthy Vanduul spy! (Welcome aboard! Check out Discord if you wanna chat or jump in to play with a fellow TESTie. Enjoy the Verse!)

Meh. Shit happens. In the end, we're all just here to fly some goddamn space ships, right? Just gotta surround yourself with like-minded individuals and enjoy the Verse!

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

A modern remake of this movie would be absolutely terrifying...

If a stripper's real name is something like Porche, do they take a normal stage name like Beth or Gertrude?

I have a Vive and I will sometimes play Star Citizen using Virtual desktop. It's not quite VR, but it's a damn sight more impressive than looking at my 24 inch monitor!

ED has an excellent premise and gameplay style, but it was horrendously executed. Mile wide - Inch deep. It seems that at every opportunity, Fdev makes exactly the wrong choice for the situation. They just can't seem to get out of their own way....

But of course, my good sir. I do indeed have a butler named Jesting. Nice chap; A bit gangly.

Love is in the air! No....wait...False alarm. Just asbestos again. Carry on, lads.

When they discovered that people would still pay that for one. It's really becoming a real problem.

You know what would be a perfect love note from CIG? "XOXO, Here's 3.0" Shun these sales, my brothers and sisters. We need to stop making CIG money until they give us more content, lest they get too comfortable in the premium JPEG business (which 2016 clearly illustrates they are headed...

Jesting, please bring more.

Meh, having a redundant ship is a bit of a waste (if you ask me) Perhaps look into some of the other non-combat roles and choose your second ship based on that? Perhaps being a data-scooper in a Herald would be more your speed?

What do you say to someone who is trying to use dinner at Taco Bell as an alibi in a murder investigation? Shits, or it didn't happen.

A week late? A WEEK?! Unacceptable! We have a culture of strict corporate efficiency here and that was FAR too quick for the likes of us! Welcome aboard, you overachieving bastard.

THIS is the TEST business card that I leave for people: ....They'll know who it's from.