Favorite Space Marine Chapter or Faction in General?

Black Sunder

Black Sunder

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Something cool about Necrons. Hive Fleet is marching along, going good. Eating worlds as it goes but then it come across a planet that may or may not have biomass on it and just goes the fuck around. Doesn't even say "I could eat that" it literally goes around and then heads back on the original path. There is SOMETHING about Necron Tomb worlds that the Hive Mind is scared shitless of. Made even more fun when the necrons awaken anyway because they detect a lot of 'life' around them and think its time to wake up.

"I see you're eating our future flesh bodies. Please, please continue to do so. We're gonna go over here and exterminate your entire fucking force down to the atom."

"Oh you have a hide that most can't penetrate? What was that you think you're awesome?" "PHASE BLADE BITCH!" ADAPT THIS!

"What is that? You cut all my Necron troops to pieces?" We'll be back!' *5 seconds later they are*

In all seriousness though I don't like the Tyranids. I don't have any specific reason except I find them annoying in DoW2 and really see them in lore as the antithesis of the Necrons(who are far more badass!). I want to see the Necrons wipe them out and there is no amount of adaption that could spare them from weapons that literally strip their hides off one layer of atoms at a time. Even if they had Wolverine Regeneration, they would run out of biomass fairly fast. Necrons would just chuckle and keep moving on.
 
Vapsyvox

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Black Sunder said:
Something cool about Necrons. Hive Fleet is marching along, going good. Eating worlds as it goes but then it come across a planet that may or may not have biomass on it and just goes the fuck around. Doesn't even say "I could eat that" it literally goes around and then heads back on the original path. There is SOMETHING about Necron Tomb worlds that the Hive Mind is scared shitless of. Made even more fun when the necrons awaken anyway because they detect a lot of 'life' around them and think its time to wake up.

"I see you're eating our future flesh bodies. Please, please continue to do so. We're gonna go over here and exterminate your entire fucking force down to the atom."

"Oh you have a hide that most can't penetrate? What was that you think you're awesome?" "PHASE BLADE BITCH!" ADAPT THIS!

"What is that? You cut all my Necron troops to pieces?" We'll be back!' *5 seconds later they are*

In all seriousness though I don't like the Tyranids. I don't have any specific reason except I find them annoying in DoW2 and really see them in lore as the antithesis of the Necrons(who are far more badass!). I want to see the Necrons wipe them out and there is no amount of adaption that could spare them from weapons that literally strip their hides off one layer of atoms at a time. Even if they had Wolverine Regeneration, they would run out of biomass fairly fast. Necrons would just chuckle and keep moving on.
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Assholetep approves.
 
Black Sunder

Black Sunder

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Point of order. Necron's primary color for weapons is neon green. That means they are shitting all over people like the Dark Angels by not only showing them up in color but also being quite happy as opposed to people like the Dark Angels who are dark green. This means every time a Necron weapon is fired, it is literally firing Necron Happiness at the enemy. The fact that no enemy can take such happiness is a sign of their own weaksauceness.

Now you're saying that "no it is literally stripping the atoms off the target" but you'd be wrong. it is removing all the unhappy atoms from the target. Its just that all targets are consequently composed of ALL unhappy atoms and thus die horribly from all the happiness they are receiving.

Flayed Ones have their own version where they give the target a hug. They are so happy to give hugs. Kinda like that pansy Nurgle but with more FEELING and instant knowledge that you have indeed been hugged.

Necrons see any and all armor as an affront to them because no armor is as cool as living metal armor which they have. Thats why all their good weapons ignore armor and go straight for the soft meat. Works doubly well on Tyranids who are still trying to figure out how to adapt to a weapon that phases out of the material world in order to hit them where it hurts: In the synaptic. Simple answer is you can't unless Matt Ward decrees it. He needs to be fired btw and the series rolled back a few editions.

And lets not forget Monoliths. They are like the greatest thing ever since Monoliths. Yep. Monoliths are so pimped out that the Salamanders are still trying to ask the Lords on tips on how to bling their own vehicles out. Some improvements have been made but the Salamanders are reluctant to paint their vehicles Black and Neon Green.

Necrons are also the only race to date that sees the need to Construct Additional Pylons. In their defense it does work rather well against other factions who don't feel the need to or have the ability to.
 
GrammarGestapo

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I think there's an argument to be made for the original noise marines. Anyone who goes around killing people with electric guitars is a badass in my book.
 
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Black Sunder

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GrammarGestapo said:



I think there's an argument to be made for the original noise marines. Anyone who goes around killing people with electric guitars is a badass in my book.
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Its funny because a Warlord Titan stealthily moved up behind them before opening fire and obliterating them due to the fact they could not hear it moving toward them.
 
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Black Sunder

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Zaraphandox said:
@Black Sunder Do you play DoW2/CR or DoW2:Ret?
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I have all of the DoW2 games. Haven't played Retribution yet though and only played once through CR so far. Still playing the hell out of the DoW2 campaign though. Its fun. Would be open to some co-op campaign play if you want.

Steam Name is Hats'n'Slacks I think is what i set it at.
 
Black Sunder

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Raggy

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Are the servers still up for the original DOW series? Man I loved that game... It makes me feel dirty to admit that I played as the filthy xenos. Hoovering up meatbags with my specially evolved mouth-arse

 
Black Sunder

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One day the Ultramarines were called to pacify a planet. They did so. Upon looking through the aftermath of their fighting a Techmarine found a curious data storage device. Plugging it in a slate and hitting it a few times he got a clear picture.

In this moving picture was an old episode of something called "the Smurfs". Minutes passed and the marine had not moved, just watching. After it was over he looked down at his own armor and a terrible connection was forged. He went immediately to Calgar himself to show him the strange artifact. After watching, Calgar ordered it destroyed as a Chaos artifact but it did not end there.

The moving picture had been so similar to his own chapter that it began to gnaw at him. The very color blue started to grate on him. More and more the similarities presented to themselves to him. Whether he knew it or not he began to push his chapter harder and faster to do great deeds and purge the Imperium of enemies, even calling on help from successor chapters to help.

The Chaos Gods however caught on to what was happening but none could take credit for it. Even Tzeentch would not claim it as a plan of his to bring down one of the most revered chapter masters. They continued to watch in interest and giving what subtle pushes they could, sending visions and setting battlefields.

Over time Calgar privately began to lose his shit. His own inner circle began to question his strategies as they did not go with the Codex. He passed these questions off stating that enemies required that they also change their strategies to eliminate them. But the blue.....it was now being seen in his dreams.

Long story short, Calgar goes mad, summons ALL successor chapters of the Ultramarines. Repaints them all blue and goes to the Eye of Terror to fuck the Chaos Gods up(and they had nothing to do with the initial formation of his doubts). Papa Smurf had finally come home to put the house in order. Eye of Terror dissipates and Chaos Gods severely weakened and now have a frightening fear of the color Blue.

Emperor comes back alive, sees everything is in order and congratulates Calgar on a job well done. Emperor heals Roboute Guilliman who sees what his now Super Legion has done and berates them all for following his instruction book so stupidly from the beginning. And for wearing the wrong color Blue. Then tells Calgar he has done a good Jorb and that he's made the Imperium a safer place and to get everyone ready to exterminate the Other Smurfs(Tau). Everyone is happy ever after.
 
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GrammarGestapo

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Black Sunder said:
One day the Ultramarines were called to pacify a planet. They did so. Upon looking through the aftermath of their fighting a Techmarine found a curious data storage device. Plugging it in a slate and hitting it a few times he got a clear picture.

In this moving picture was an old episode of something called "the Smurfs". Minutes passed and the marine had not moved, just watching. After it was over he looked down at his own armor and a terrible connection was forged. He went immediately to Calgar himself to show him the strange artifact. After watching, Calgar ordered it destroyed as a Chaos artifact but it did not end there.

The moving picture had been so similar to his own chapter that it began to gnaw at him. The very color blue started to grate on him. More and more the similarities presented to themselves to him. Whether he knew it or not he began to push his chapter harder and faster to do great deeds and purge the Imperium of enemies, even calling on help from successor chapters to help.

The Chaos Gods however caught on to what was happening but none could take credit for it. Even Tzeentch would not claim it as a plan of his to bring down one of the most revered chapter masters. They continued to watch in interest and giving what subtle pushes they could, sending visions and setting battlefields.

Over time Calgar privately began to lose his shit. His own inner circle began to question his strategies as they did not go with the Codex. He passed these questions off stating that enemies required that they also change their strategies to eliminate them. But the blue.....it was now being seen in his dreams.

Long story short, Calgar goes mad, summons ALL successor chapters of the Ultramarines. Repaints them all blue and goes to the Eye of Terror to fuck the Chaos Gods up(and they had nothing to do with the initial formation of his doubts). Papa Smurf had finally come home to put the house in order. Eye of Terror dissipates and Chaos Gods severely weakened and now have a frightening fear of the color Blue.

Emperor comes back alive, sees everything is in order and congratulates Calgar on a job well done. Emperor heals Roboute Guilliman who sees what his now Super Legion has done and berates them all for following his instruction book so stupidly from the beginning. And for wearing the wrong color Blue. Then tells Calgar he has done a good Jorb and that he's made the Imperium a safer place and to get everyone ready to exterminate the Other Smurfs(Tau). Everyone is happy ever after.
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did you write that or get it off 4chan? God I love 1d4chan.
 
GrammarGestapo

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In a meeting between the Blood Ravens' finest Librarians and pious Chaplains, Captain Indrick Boreale requested from them a speech that would inspire his troops to victory, seeing that his original one was insufficient. While the 2 parties did make a glorious speech, Captain Boreale's ad-libs, mispronunciations and improvisations virtually gutted the speech made by them.


Tehre is noh time to beh lohst!


Batul Brothas!


Spehss Mahrens, todeh the enemeh is at oua doar! We know oua duteh and we will do eet. We fight for our honor as Blod Rehvens,
as SPESS MAHRENS, and we fight in the nehme of the Empra!


And if we die this deh we die in gloareh, we die heroes' deffs, but we shall not die, no! It is the enemeh who will tehste
deff and defeat!


As you know! Moast of oua battle brothars are shtehtioned in SPEHSS, Pruhpeared to deep strike! Oua perimeter has been
pruhpeared in the even dat oua enehmies should be so bald and so foolish. We have plehced numerous beacons, allowing for
muhltiple, simuln-tehneous and devashtehting defensive deep strikes


The Codecks astartees nehmes this maneuvah Steel Rehn. We will descend upon the foe, we will ovawhelm them - we will leave none
alive! Meanwhile oua ground fawses will ensue the full defense of oua headkwaters


We are the spehss mahrens! WE ARE THE EMPRA'S FUREH!
 
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