Giveaway: Razer Deathadder 2013

[Egriz]

*hic*

Okay so here's the deal. I have a Razer Deathadder 2013 to give away to this wonderful community. It is not brand new, but it is basically new. I purchased it, took it out of the box, and used it a couple times. I will ship with the original box and everything. The mouse is 100% working like new. I just prefer a different mouse :)

Since I love you guys so much, I want to give the mouse to a fellow TESTie who needs it, for whichever reason it may be, whether you are not financially able to buy a new mouse, or you just spilled beer on your mouse and need a new one :)

Rules:

-Must be a TEST member (duh)
-X up or simply state that you're entering in order to be eligible.
-Any drunken stories or stories about why you are in need of a new mouse are welcome, but any and all TEST members are eligible to win, not just those with interesting stories!

I do not require the winner to pay for shipping, especially if you are not financially stable enough to buy a new mouse, I'm not going to force you to pay shipping. However, if you would like to help and pay for shipping, I won't say no. As I am living in the States, I do ask for any potential winner from our international crowd to assist with shipping, as international shipping is quite expensive. However, I do not fully require this if it is not possible for the winner. This is my gift to the TEST community and I don't want somebody to not win just because they can't pay for shipping.

Winner will be selected on Friday, May 2nd 2014 at 8:00 PM EST.

Good luck :)

 

[CaptSpackle]

So here's a story that comes to mind.

I was drunk once. (Obviously) Some context: I spent my days in college going to class and driving back to my parents house for the first two years. Finally I decided to move onto campus (I lived in the former murder capital of the world, mind you). In doing so I also decided joining a fraternity would be a great idea. Murder capital dues are stupid low and good drunken times were often had by all. We played super smash brothers and got smashed more times than I can count.

Let me start by telling you the ending to this story. I woke up on a Sunday hung over out of my mind shirtless with a box of pizza in one hand and an empty bottle of jack daniel's in the other. In a snow drift. In a public park outside our fraternity house. The park was known for its shady drug dealings after dark and illicit sex trades.

One particularly wintery evening in northeastern Ohio, I found myself getting extra smashed. You see, I had entered 24 can case race solo (we normally do teams) and proceeded to drink all 24 cans in under 2.5 hours (we can debate the merits of my intoxication at a later date). It was at this point that I only have video evidence and anecdotal reflections from others to rely on.

Apparently I ran to the bathroom where our shortest member was pissing (he's 5'4" and I'm 5'10"). I proceeded to ask him nicely to leave (GET THE FUCK OUT). When he didn't comply, I apparently showered him in vomit. Thinking I had recovered I am told that I then went on to find a bottle of Jack Daniels. Consuming it with haste, I proceeded to break two beer pong tables, our fake suit of armor, and a kitchen table trying to get some pizza. Becoming a wise hulk, I ripped off my t-shirt (which had gotten torn during the beer pong incidents) smashed through the front door, ran across the street with the box of pizza and proceeded to pass out in a snow drift some 40 yards into the park. No one could find me and it was presumed I got a ride home. However, if you remember the end of this story you'll note that I have about 8-9 hours of unaccounted for time where I was in a snow drift.

What does this have to do with a mouse? I have no idea. I just felt like telling you about it.

 

[Montoya]

I have a story, but its XXX rated and will set bad precedent if I repeat it here.

I will have to dig through my archives and find a tame story I can tell.

 

[Koreth]

*hic*
Rules:

-Must be drunk.

I shall return...

 

[Cpt. John Geary]

I have a story, but its XXX rated and will set bad precedent if I repeat it here.

I will have to dig through my archives and find a tame story I can tell.

I will love to hear that story :D

 

[Egriz]

Okay new/updated rules, just to avoid any confusion.

ANY and ALL TEST members are eligible.

You do not necessarily "need" a new mouse to enter to win.

To enter, simply X up, say you're in, or anything along those lines. A story is not necessary to enter. But feel free to share stories :) I won't necessarily use any drunken or heartfelt story to determine the winner, but it still may be a factor. It'll most likely be random from a pool.

I want everybody to have a fair chance and nobody to be discouraged from entering to win!

 

[Coryphaues]

I'll throw my hat in, I'll put a story up, gota pick one.

EDIT:

Ran from the cops in my car threw a bottle of grape juice and vodka out the window, got away, but came back couple hours later to get the grape juice and vodka to finish it.

Got drunk with a friend, danced with a group of women, got them to their place, when alone one looked and me with a serious face said, "I don't mind you can hit me, I dated a marine". Noped outa that one

I'm a hasher (Google it), the amount of debauchery that I have gotten into with that group..... Y'all should try it out in your local chapters.. OnOn

Almost got hit by a cop car on acid once, yes it was their fault.

I served beer to my classmates in class! HAH, almost forgot that one. I had a presentation about statistical correlation with DD accidents and per capita consumption of alcohol, found out there was no correlation. Anyways, I had a prop for the presentation, "soda cans" that I mocked up to look like beer cans. Friends got beer, others got soda. This was a Dry campus.

Drinking more times I can count in college classes, hard alcohol and smoothies are your friend.

13 people, 1 keg, and a case of beer. Two days.

Love me a game of wizard staff.



I could go on.

I really need a new mouse. I have, many stories, on many topics.


Disclaimer:
*While these are written from a first person perspective, all these stories are a "friends"

 

[Tyrax]

Tyrax, signing in. This is the story of a drunk worthy of TEST. Me and a friend are walking downtown in my local town, when we see a nice man and his girlfriend stumbling home. This is the conversation that followed.
Man: YOu see, I can't drtink anymore, becaush if I drank anymore I woud pass out...
Woman: mmhmm
Man: and if yoo drink anymore, you would be sick, and i cant DO you if your sick...

Me and my friend glanced at each other and gave a silent nod of approval to the man. Did he do her when they got home? Unlikely. But I like to think he got lucky. I'm a dreamer like that.

 

[Designated Drunk]

Me and my friend glanced at each other and gave a silent nod of approval to the man. Did he do her when they got home? Unlikely. But I like to think he got lucky. I'm a dreamer like that.

Plot twist: That man was Montoya, and this is the XXX rated story of which he speaks.

 

[Prothean]

Can I join in? I've never been drunk before, so no stories, but I once convinced a bandit in DayZ to run away by stripping nude and being submissive at first sight. I'm pretty boring.

 

[Worm]

No stories sadly but I am in need of new mouse. Pretty awesome that you're doing a giveaway for TEST members though!

 

[Designated Drunk]

I actually don't want to be entered in the giveaway (I'm too late, it turns out), but I figured the background is rather apropos.

I'm a cheap bastard, so my mouse is generally the bare minimum that is required to survive and pwn n00bz. You can always tell if a mouse is mine by flipping it over and looking at the underside. If it's mine, at least one of the teflon 'nubs' has to be worn so far that the entire sector is worn smooth and there is no longer any nub or evidence of its prior existence. I tend to keep mice longer than I keep cars, and my previous mouse was purchased before the current presidential administration, I'm sure. The formica on my computer desk is worn so smooth in the mouse area that it could probably be used as a mirror element in a precision optical instrument.

So last month I determined that my trusty mouse was in need of replacement. It was nothing fancy - in fact, it was downright pedestrian. I'm not sure what model it was (other than discontinued), but it was a Logitech, and was comparable to the current M100, which has an MSRP of nine dollars and ninety-nine cents. It featured optical sensing technology, PS/2 connection, left and right mouse buttons, as well as a clickable scroll wheel. The bottom was made of smoky translucent plastic rather than an opaque material, which by itself was enough to elevate this particular model to 'baller' status for anyone who was fortunate to gaze upon it. (that last bit was sarcasm, by the way, if you were confused)

However, this oh-so-trusty of devices was starting to show its age. Specifically, the left mouse button was beginning to act in an erratic manner, no longer processing inputs as well as it should. One particularly grueling game* was giving me fits, as I'd click the LMB but the response would come tenths of a second too late. It worked well enough for office apps, web browsing, etc., but it just wasn't pulling its weight for gaming, so I figured it was time for a replacement. I looked at the local Best Buy for gaming mice, but holy crap, the high-end ones have more buttons than an IBM Selectric. Off to Amazon, then, and I selected this top-of-the-line beauty:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0095ONNTC/ref=oh_details_o01_s00_i00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

That's right, bitches - it's not a Razer, it's a MAZER. Let me break it down for you:

• Buttons: 6 buttons with scroll wheel(Two Side-Buttons)
• Avago 5090 Chipset
• 4000FPS frames per second (4.2 megapixels per second)
• Switch Life: 8 million cycle
• Customize DPI Switch: 500/1250/1750/2500dpi

I only know what half of that means, but I can give you the tl;dr version - I can pwn n00bz once more**. And that's all that matters.




* - That grueling game that was giving me fits with LMB response? Aurora Crash. I shit you not. Played it on my laptop and I was like "holy crap, my desktop mouse is busted!" Not like playing it on my laptop improved my score any - some of us are just born to crash, baby.

** - Unless that game happens to be TF2 where Jumanx is a spy on the other team. In which case, I will have my ass handed to me on a silver platter engraved with the succinct phrase "L2P NUB".

 

[SeungRyul]

Thanks for doing this! Please DONT include me in raffle. I am quite happy with my MadCatz RAT 7. :)

 

[Shive]

Gonna buy the MadDog Yo666, I'm good too.

 

[Designated Drunk]

Gonna buy the MadDog Yo666, I'm good too.

Only MadDog of note 'round here is Mad Dog 20/20... amirite?

 

[BluChew]

Only MadDog of note 'round here is Mad Dog 20/20... amirite?

Oh GAWD! Too many bad memories with MD *shudders*. Its cheap and turns into Hawaiian Punch when it comes back up! ;)

PS: Dont need a mouse either, just wanted to comment on the MD 20/20. Lets just say (Friends Sister + MD 20/20 = Regret). Which then leads to the consumption of more MD... vicious cycle

 

[Shive]

Oh GAWD! Too many bad memories with MD *shudders*. Its cheap and turns into Hawaiian Punch when it comes back up! ;)

PS: Dont need a mouse either, just wanted to comment on the MD 20/20. Lets just say (Friends Sister + MD 20/20 = Regret). Which then leads to the consumption of more MD... vicious cycle

Yes, please elaborate - for just how long did this circle continue?

 

[BluChew]

Yes, please elaborate - for just how long did this circle continue?

Longer than I'd like to admit, but that's in the past and I'm happily incarcerated married. ;)

 

[stefmor90]

Thanks for doing this! Please DONT include me in raffle. I am quite happy with my MadCatz RAT 7. :)

IS THAT ADVERTISING I SEE?

Have fun with ur report m8

 

[Macabre Poetry]

X up. Will write up about the time my mouse because a projectile weapon for my brother.