Apart from 'Drunk' how to you plan to end 2016?
Considering the string of pretty crap events that have happened all the way through, i'm planning to watch the worst film in my DVD collection to see this year out.
In the running are:
Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus, starring Debbie Gibson. The modern-day B movie that spawned a hundred more. You are most likely to have seen this one from the list, so i started here.
Martians Go Home, starring Randy Quaid. Got this for 10p from a second-hand movie shop. We paid to much. Wise cracking Martians invade the earth and make life inconvenient, making trips to the toilet awkward and ruining people love lives.
Blues Brothers 2000. Because it is not the original Blues Brothers featuring Carrie Fisher with a flame-thrower and John Belushi. It had a lot to live up to and it missed by quite a margin.
Tank Girl. One of my favourites, a live action movie based on a comic book, I then went our and read the comics and realised they worked hard but missed the energy of the comics - a film that disappointed the fans and did not appeal to anyone else. I saw 1997 in with this one when it was on TV, so it may be disqualified?
Judge Dredd (90's Stallone Version) - Another one of my favourites, another Comics film I saw before reading the comics, but even I knew Dredd had never taken his helmet off, the comic readers had never actually seen his face. What happens 2 minutes in? Stallone takes his hat off, we see his face and it stays that way for more of the film. Otherwise a fairly well done film if you don't know the source material with a bit of a ropey story, an annoying comic-relief character, and a cool as hell war robot.
Hudson Hawk starring Bruce Willis. This was one film I would watch whenever it was on TV no matter what was on any other channel. So delightfully over the top, with American popular references I was not going to get in a million years living in the UK. I could relate more to Willis' classic line "Guess you're not going to that hat convention in July" when a baddie is decapitated because the baddie had a bad British accent.
Dominator, the Animated movie featuring the voice of Dani Filth, lead singer from the band Cradle Of Filth. An indi film animated in someones front room that got a widespread DVD release with the Manga label. The story is missing the polish bigger releases get, the pacing is not too good, some of the voice actors are not great, the animation looks like it was done in someones front room (it was) - In short, Pixar has spoilt it for the rest of us. Its bad, but its glorious and Cradle of Filth did the soundtrack so that carrys you through the film in a swift pace.
Howard The Duck. Another comics film another wild misinterpretation of the source material. Dark Overlords, dudes drinking a nuclear power station dry with their mouth tentacles, it was my favourite film as a child to the point my mum tried to buy the tape off the video shop but they would not sell, it got to the point where we rented it every week for a month.
Other memorable crap films i don't have are the live action version of He-Man and the masters of the universe and Sky Captain and the World Of Tomorrow, a film so bad I bought it just to watch it, then put it in an envelope with "To Santa" as the address and put it in the post. In August. Sorry Santa, this expalins all the coal every year.
So which should I watch in the last 2 hours of 2016?
Considering the string of pretty crap events that have happened all the way through, i'm planning to watch the worst film in my DVD collection to see this year out.
In the running are:
Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus, starring Debbie Gibson. The modern-day B movie that spawned a hundred more. You are most likely to have seen this one from the list, so i started here.
Martians Go Home, starring Randy Quaid. Got this for 10p from a second-hand movie shop. We paid to much. Wise cracking Martians invade the earth and make life inconvenient, making trips to the toilet awkward and ruining people love lives.
Blues Brothers 2000. Because it is not the original Blues Brothers featuring Carrie Fisher with a flame-thrower and John Belushi. It had a lot to live up to and it missed by quite a margin.
Tank Girl. One of my favourites, a live action movie based on a comic book, I then went our and read the comics and realised they worked hard but missed the energy of the comics - a film that disappointed the fans and did not appeal to anyone else. I saw 1997 in with this one when it was on TV, so it may be disqualified?
Judge Dredd (90's Stallone Version) - Another one of my favourites, another Comics film I saw before reading the comics, but even I knew Dredd had never taken his helmet off, the comic readers had never actually seen his face. What happens 2 minutes in? Stallone takes his hat off, we see his face and it stays that way for more of the film. Otherwise a fairly well done film if you don't know the source material with a bit of a ropey story, an annoying comic-relief character, and a cool as hell war robot.
Hudson Hawk starring Bruce Willis. This was one film I would watch whenever it was on TV no matter what was on any other channel. So delightfully over the top, with American popular references I was not going to get in a million years living in the UK. I could relate more to Willis' classic line "Guess you're not going to that hat convention in July" when a baddie is decapitated because the baddie had a bad British accent.
Dominator, the Animated movie featuring the voice of Dani Filth, lead singer from the band Cradle Of Filth. An indi film animated in someones front room that got a widespread DVD release with the Manga label. The story is missing the polish bigger releases get, the pacing is not too good, some of the voice actors are not great, the animation looks like it was done in someones front room (it was) - In short, Pixar has spoilt it for the rest of us. Its bad, but its glorious and Cradle of Filth did the soundtrack so that carrys you through the film in a swift pace.
Howard The Duck. Another comics film another wild misinterpretation of the source material. Dark Overlords, dudes drinking a nuclear power station dry with their mouth tentacles, it was my favourite film as a child to the point my mum tried to buy the tape off the video shop but they would not sell, it got to the point where we rented it every week for a month.
Other memorable crap films i don't have are the live action version of He-Man and the masters of the universe and Sky Captain and the World Of Tomorrow, a film so bad I bought it just to watch it, then put it in an envelope with "To Santa" as the address and put it in the post. In August. Sorry Santa, this expalins all the coal every year.
So which should I watch in the last 2 hours of 2016?