AstroSamantha is gone, or: are women the better men...?

[Blind Owl]

Serious talk now Sam... I have to revoke your pass to all slumber parties, hen nights and practice make out sessions.

Sorry about that.

Oh no!!!

 

[AstroSam]

Willkommen zuruck Sam :)

Genau willkommen zurück Sam :D
Ich bin nicht nachtragend oder sonst was :)

PS: ich mach gerade ein ähnliches "Experiment" sag ich mal

Dankeschön, ihr zwei :)
Immer schön vorsichtig mit solchen Experimenten ;) Mich hats psychisch am Ende ganz schön ins Schleudern gebracht. :oops:

That was quite a read, Sam! I'm sorry you had to go through all that. We definitely missed you and love AstroSam/Samantha!

You have NOTHING to apologize for! There are times when I weep for my gender, how weak and insecure some of us are, and what we do and say to women to reinforce our sense of masculinity. It is men like this who should apologize to YOU and turn away from their neanderthal behavior!

My name is not really @Beerjerker either. :p
Glad you're sticking around! :D

Welcome back Sam!
And thanks for sharing the story.

I could not have said it better.

I don't care what you call yourself as long as you are with us.

Thank you all. Glad to be back and receiving such a hearty welcome :)

Beautiful dog too.

I'm impressed by the depth of your "social experiment". Kudos for doing that, and for having the strength to get that inside look into what ladies deal with. And thank you for revealing the truth to us: that couldn't have been easy.

No, that indeed wasn't it. As written in my opening post, this whole decision took quite a while.

Yeah, our lovely doggy; 12 she is, will become 13 next year in April, and the times, where we ran 15 or 20 kilometers together are long gone. She is becoming ill by her age, and it hurts us every day a little bit. But still she wants to play and is in a good mood, very heart-warming. We are happy and thankful for every day she is with us. :)

The trick to being female on the internet is to be "one of the guys". It's depressing really, but there will always be guys out there who are disrespectful, there's plenty of others who are absolutely wonderful. Much in the same way there are women who I wouldn't want to spend 5 minutes in the company of, so don't think it's just your gender who are awful! Terrible people live all along the gender spectrum, women just tend to be more subtle about it so it doesn't come across as much online...

I can see the temptation to do things like this, heck I'm fully aware that I get an abnormal amount of respect from certain people based on my gender, which I'm sure I wouldn't get if I was simply "one of the guys", I haven't earnt that respect, I've just been a female member of a largely male group.

In my experience there are usually 9 guys willing to defend you for every 1 who attacks you, decent people outnumber the crappy ones!

Anyway, nice to (re-)meet you Sam, glad you learnt from your experience and super-glad your picture didn't involve a corset and fishnets :p

...but if I would've been a woman in RL you would've been thankful for such a picture, admit it :p:D

Thank you Sam.

All is forgiven. While I don't like G.I.R.L.s (Guy In Real Life) in general because it makes it harder for us, at the same time, your learning experience and honesty redeems that. I do believe that your intention was not to deceive but to experiment.

And I do wish that more guys would have to experience what it's like being a woman for a while. That being said, believe it or not, your experience was probably a mild one. I've found that the Star Citizen community is more mature than the average gaming crowd, but there are still stereotypical gamers in there too. There is still harassment. And while the blatant harassment like you described isn't as bad here, the subtle stuff, more quiet patronising, is still around. I don't think it's on purpose, it's a cultural thing, but it's still there. Like when I hear, "OMG, it's a girl!" Or for example, at Citizen Con, a couple guys asked me, "Do you actually play Star Citizen?" (Also see @witchkittie 's open letter on diversity:

https://twitter.com/i/web/status/788586963225894912

View: https://twitter.com/WitchkittieTv/status/788586963225894912
)

I also know some women who play video games under masculine or unisex names so that they don't get treated differently.

And that's why I'm as visual as I am. It's a choice and a responsibility. I'm a decent pilot. Not to be too full of myself, but I'm better than the average player. I get my ass handed to me by the best pilots, sure, but at least they consider me worth their time. I stream Star Citizen, and my focus is on the game. My webcam is set from my shoulders up. I feel like that's what I have to do to be taken seriously. But at the same time, I'm showing that girls can be hardcore gamers too. I'm hoping to help women get more respect in this game and others. That's why I'm involved with Diverse the Verse (and yet we got slammed on reddit for only having women on our podcast....).

@Lienna is absolutely right. The trick is to just be one of the guys. I try to do this while retaining my identity. I got there by being blunt, and while I'll call someone out for sexism, I also try to see things from their perspective instead of getting offended. It's a delicate balance.

Thank you for not only revealing your identity, but for using this as a learning experience for yourself, and sharing that with others. Sadly, sometimes this truth needs to come from a guy. I don't like to talk about gender disparities in gaming a whole lot, preferring to highlight the positive sides. But part of the reason I stay away from the subject is because so many guys just think I'm whining. That surely it can't be that bad. It varies a lot, but it's still there.

Thank you very much, dear Mz :) I have to say, reading your explanation "your experience was probably a mild one" made me gasp. And the same time it strengthens me in my resulting opinion - and call in the final sentences of my opening posts - that those guys have to become some lessons in virtual behaviour.
And thats the valuable experience resulting from my "experiment", because I always thought that to be a woman is so much easier than a guy. Never would I have expected to face the opposite. I pull off my hat and bow before you and your strength and character to handle this, dear Mz; my deepest respect.

Yeah... I am definately *not actually* Zapp Brannigan, although, I think his character encompasses exactly what you are talking about above. Honestly, I think that the parody of Zapp is a healthy sign simply because it mocks the nature of that mindset. What scares me, at least in America, is that we seem to be reverting to our Zapp mindset by having people think rape isn't that big of an issue and others that talk about women in objectifying ways rather than with respect; then claiming that, "nobody respects women more than them". I think more men need to do what you did and put themselves in a woman's shoes... it would be enlightening for them, I'm sure.

That being said, you are and will continue to be one of my favorite people on here. Your posts are often a bright point on gloomy days.

Thanks for recognizing me, oh great Emperor :D Did you know that also I am definitely *not acutally* Sam K Macer? :eek:
Thing is, that I really loved this "AstroSamantha". But the more I got involved into the community, the more I felt guilty of betraying your trust in me. Plus the more I loved her, the more I excluded myself of the gaming community. Plus I had lost my fun being a woman. And, as unfair as it seems, I for sure *had* the opportunity to say "I don't wanna be a woman anymore". It was only the question how to do this. The result can be seen with this thread ;) I just wanted to clear things up in the most responsible way.

WHAAAT??


People need to chill the fuck out. That's all there is to it. I'm not sure why some men feel the need to dominate* women. I feel they are definitely a minority, albiet a very vocal minority, that unfortunately ruin someone's day. These same people like to ruin the days of other men too, but just go about it in a different trolly way, I just find it pathetic they resort to such low standards of harrassment when it comes to women.

On another note, I'm not really a big fan of people apologizing or stating they're ashamed for the male gender as a whole**. These bottom feeders are not real men. They are not in the majority and they do not hold any real power over anyone.


I LOVE Sam's posts! Such positivity from someone is always a wonderful influence!

*(Unless you're talking in an actual Dominant sense, but then that's all consensual)
**Sorry, @Carlos Spicyweiner , nothing personal against you, it just kinda bothers me. I have a friend who is always martyring his ego to make sure everyone in the room understands he supports all women's causes at all times. Gets old.

Thanks dear Grimbli. I'm honestly not feeling positive every day - but I'm trying not to show it, because writing funny and positive things can also change your bad mood into a sunny one. Especially here on TEST ;)

We still love you, @Sam K Macer . It's sad that the internet is full of so many kinds of uncivilized people. My mind can't really grasp sexism, racism or other kinds of stereotypes in the 21st century. It all seems so barbaric and uneducated.
But wait... does that mean you're not actually a... barrista?

Actually, more a Barista. But I don't care - the double "r" is TEST(tm) :D

OKAY! Fine. I admit it. I'm actually just three children in a trench coat. Feels good to get that off our chests. In all seriousness: I find your experiment intriguing and, to be honest, I've always wondered about that myself. I hope that someday we get to the point where the (mostly virgin) dickheads sprinkled around the verse don't automatically try to act like some hotshot womanizer the second they catch the scent of a woman in their server. When I see an enemy StarFarer flown by CMDR JAck, Ill board it and kill everyone. When I see an enemy StarFarer flown by CMDR Jill, Ill board it and kill everyone. Equality is equality, because taking it easy on someone in a VIDEO GAME because of their genitals is a bit absurd, is it not?

Welcome back, Sam

You wondered about yourself in which context, Han?

btw., if you enter my StarFarer without asking I will kill you - with love for sure, but kill anyway ;)

I think it's great that virtual worlds give us opportunities to experiment with our identities

we may not always be comfortable with what happens but we definitely learn and grow from our experiences

you can be Sam or AstroSamantha - your humanity shines through either way

Many heartfelt thanks for those words; it touches me, thanks a lot :)

 

[AstroSam]

More answers lateron. Have to do some work - and serve the morning coffee for sure ;)

 

[Lythan]

That was quite the adventure you had there, the behavior between men and women is a complex one with quite the extremes, especially on the internet where social morals and such don't effect us as much.

It reminds me of an article on how a woman was harassed in VR (using the Vive) from the moment she spoke (and thus it became apparent there was a female in the VR game). A player would constantly follow her and grope her chest and such. This gave her such a bad experience that she'll likely never want to use VR again.

Although these are minority cases, the problem is consistent and hard to deal with.

I dislike bullies in general, I don't care if its a guy, a girl, a dog or a lamp post that's being bullied. Such behavior is unacceptable to me and I'll do my best to help the person in need... As well as the one doing the bullying. I'll try to help them in realizing that they are actually hurting more then just a pixel character. In the hopes that it changes their behavior and possibly turn them to more accepted morals. ... If that makes any sense.


Though I have to admit I'm a little confused right now... But it doesn't matter, you are Sam. Your posts generally give off warm fuzzy fibes. Doesn't really matter where they come from because; They make me feel welcome. :D

 

[AstroSam]

They make me feel welcome. :D

 

[AstroSam]

There are a lot of weirdos on the internet, it's true. I feel so sorry for the bullshit women have to deal with just because they get on an online game. I find the best policy is be nice to everyone without getting too friendly. If you see someone reacting differently than you'd expect to something you've said, tailor your behavior so as not to offend them again, or even outright apologize. Then, once you really become good friends with someone, insult the hell out of them constantly so they know you love them. That's how that's supposed to work, right?

In all seriousness, since the days of RSI chat, it has always been my policy and generally the policy of those around me not to notice when someone says they're a girl. Just treat them like a person.

"Be nice to everyone" - I'm with you in this point. And I'm not saying that you *have* to be nice to a woman aka don't shoot her or the like. Treat her like anyone else, I'm totally fine with that. But not treating her like a subject which is only good for....I don't even like to write about. I sometimes felt people were bullying me by thinking "oh my gosh, look at that one; a girl in space, that is so wrong". And then "it" started, and sometimes I just had to leave the instance (most of the times I shot back or ignored him/them).

Firstly, I will say that I did notice and miss your shitposting. So I'm glad you have returned to us.

I very much enjoyed reading this, as well as everyone's replies. I, too, remember having the maturity of a 11 year old. I've been playing games for a long time, and I'm sure I crossed paths with a few female gamers in my youth. And I'm also sure that my immature self treated them less that respectfully. When World of Warcraft came out, I recall rolling a female character at one point. That didn't last long. Being a still immature 14 year old exposed to that kind of sexual harassment just because of the sex of my character in a game. Wow. I will never forget how that made me feel, even if it was all unfounded because I was actually a guy. So because of that, I have always had the utmost respect for those females who can tolerate and move past that.

Thanks - and yes, absolutely!
(glad to be back for pushing the shitpost-frequency again :D)

I've always assumed 99% of the women on the internet were men. I'm still waiting for all the Lady Twitch streamers to whip off their masks and yell "HAHAHAHAHA" in a maniacal neckbeard voice.

Did you speak with @MzHartz and @witchkittie about this...problem of yours? :D

They definitely are persons, I once got shot by a *something*Kitty in a Warden while I left my Delta to do a ICC mission :D:D:D:D:D

:eek: Beware of them space kittens! :eek:

cool we have a dog playing Sc in test

Yes - always sleeping aside my feet when I'm cruising through the verse :)

Having only been a member a short time, I still have to echo what others have said - I enjoyed your posts for the wit, not because of your gender. As far I'm concerned when it comes to gaming, gender doesn't matter. If you choose to RP a female pilot, so be it. You wouldn't be alone. Honestly, what's the point of a game if you were yourself in the game. To me the whole purpose is to escape from real life. Perhaps that persona is a mirror of yourself or maybe something deep inside you, or maybe you're just having fun. The bottom line is don't let anyone harass you. Glad to have you back on the forum / in TEST.

Thanks a lot! :)

So does this mean I will see you back in the shitposting thread? I have been stuck with these people :eek: need the creativity back!

(yes I read all of it)

I'll be back. Soon(TM) :D

What a wonderful and amazing org we have here. I love you all.

I do hope that I did not contribute in any way to the negative side of what happened.

I also sincerely sincerely hope that the really negative stuff that happened did not happen on our forums! If god forbid it did I think we need to take a long hard look at ourselves!

We just want you back!

:) Nothing to forgive, everything was - and is - fine, dear BUTUZ. Happy to be back. The question is: will you furtheron be glad if I'm starting shitposting again? :eek:;)

Well, I do sometimes have a beard....

...
...
...
HAHAHAHAHA!!!

:D:D:D

Yes, I hate you all in the nicest way possible.

:D:D:D:D

Mein lieber Sam.
ich hab dich vermisst.
Nach deinem Abschiedsbrief habe ich mir ein viel schwärzeres Bild gemalt.
Es ist beruhigend, erleichternd, einfach toll, dass du wieder dabei bist.
Ohne dich ist das Forum irgendwie nicht das selbe.

Der Kaffee in deiner Bar wurde mehr schlecht als recht von @CrudeSasquatch gekocht, ein grauen!

Und du bist unser*e Sam!
Also nochmal, willkommen zurück!



PS:
Dein Text hat mich zum Nachdenken angeregt, aber wenn du jezt glaubst, dass du deswegen weniger Kekse und Umarmungen von mir bekommst, dann mein lieber, bist du bei mir an den Falschen Geraten, ich mag dich nämlich trotzdem.
So das haste jetzt davon :p

What Varku said. I think. ;)

Absolutely :D

https://www.allmystery.de/i/t74eae6_Kruemelmonster-isst-Kekse.gif
:D:D:D

Serious talk now Sam... I have to revoke your pass to all slumber parties, hen nights and practice make out sessions.

Sorry about that.

:(

...and if I'm wearing a fishnet costume? :D

That was quite the adventure you had there, the behavior between men and women is a complex one with quite the extremes, especially on the internet where social morals and such don't effect us as much.

It reminds me of an article on how a woman was harassed in VR (using the Vive) from the moment she spoke (and thus it became apparent there was a female in the VR game). A player would constantly follow her and grope her chest and such. This gave her such a bad experience that she'll likely never want to use VR again.

Although these are minority cases, the problem is consistent and hard to deal with.

I dislike bullies in general, I don't care if its a guy, a girl, a dog or a lamp post that's being bullied. Such behavior is unacceptable to me and I'll do my best to help the person in need... As well as the one doing the bullying. I'll try to help them in realizing that they are actually hurting more then just a pixel character. In the hopes that it changes their behavior and possibly turn them to more accepted morals. ... If that makes any sense.


Though I have to admit I'm a little confused right now... But it doesn't matter, you are Sam. Your posts generally give off warm fuzzy fibes. Doesn't really matter where they come from because; They make me feel welcome. :D

And vice versa. Thank you very much :) :) :)
Sad story about this VR-case, though :(

 

[Lienna]

:(

...and if I'm wearing a fishnet costume? :D

Don't you worry, Rocky Horror night is open to everyone!

 

[AstroSam]

Haha :D

 

[Gearen]

AstroSamanta was a great name (and cool ;) )

 

[AstroSam]

Fully d'accord :)

https://c1.staticflickr.com/9/8572/16440897142_65d8dc19d6_b.jpg

 

[Han Burgundy]

You wondered about yourself in which context, Han?

You know what? Screw it. You're right. It's time to be brave. From now on I would like to self-identify as an attack helicopter. It feels great to finally be viewed from the outside the same I have always felt on the inside.

 

[AstroSam]

Hm.

 

[Blind Owl]

You know what? Screw it. You're right. It's time to be brave. From now on I would like to self-identify as an attack helicopter. It feels great to finally be viewed from the outside the same I have always felt on the inside.

Ha! Hahaha.

 

[Blind Owl]

No, that indeed wasn't it. As written in my opening post, this whole decision took quite a while.

I imagine. I'm really proud of both you and this community. You for taking the chance on TEST, and TEST for being the amazing awesome loving people that we all are.
:yellow_heart:

 

[Blind Owl]

Yeah, our lovely doggy; 12 she is, will become 13 next year in April, and the times, where we ran 15 or 20 kilometers together are long gone. She is becoming ill by her age, and it hurts us every day a little bit. But still she wants to play and is in a good mood, very heart-warming. We are happy and thankful for every day she is with us. :slight_smile:

Beautiful. Simply beautiful. You're making me tear up a wee bit here.

Absolutely :smile:

https://www.allmystery.de/i/t74eae6_Kruemelmonster-isst-Kekse.gif
:smile::smile::smile:

Oh good. Haha

 

[AstroSam]

I imagine. I'm really proud of both you and this community. You for taking the chance on TEST, and TEST for being the amazing awesome loving people that we all are.
:yellow_heart:

True; no more to say :yellow_heart::blush:

 

[Blind Owl]

True; no more to say :yellow_heart::blush:

Amen.

 

[Blind Owl]

True; no more to say :yellow_heart::blush:

Except SUPER-MEGA-JUMBO-LIKE!

 

[AstroSam]

Hahaha, also true :beers::beers::beers::beers::smile::smile::smile::thumbsup::v::100::100::100:

 

[CrudeSasquatch]

Is it okay to start posting insensitive sexist neckbeard jokes?
I only have a few days left to really stir the pot around here.