Atlas Defense Industries requires members to earn certifications to fly their own ships!

Phantomoftruth

Space Marshal
Feb 14, 2016
1,154
3,863
2,650
RSI Handle
PhantomofTruth
I trolled their recruiter. Atlas has PRINCIPALS man...they are a REAL organization of REAL military personnel.

Texion: Hi there, Welcome to ADI! My name's Texion, is there anything I can help you with today?

Don Cornelious: Drill em hard And deep. All my org mates are Navy SEALs
I even got the guy who got osama.
This is a script worthy of Jerky Boys. I may record this over Saturday.
 

CrudeSasquatch

Space Marshal
Jan 1, 2016
3,876
15,933
2,850
RSI Handle
CrudeSasquatch
BACK ON TOPIC ADI IS LAME AND SMELLS BAD, TEST IS BEST etc etc

I heard that the Admiral of some base somewhere overheard his... Senior-Firstclass-Private-Seaman-Ensign type guys talking about Star Citizen and how it was going to be a great getaway from day to day Army & Navy life, so he created ADI and forced everyone under his command to buy Star Citizen... so he could rule them FOREVER!!
 

TheWoad

ADI Spai
Feb 15, 2015
108
298
1,710
RSI Handle
Woady McWoadface
I remember reading somewhere, many times in many places, that TEST was supposed to be a somewhat anarchistic organisation that basically gives people a launchpad to do whatever they want. There have been conversations on this topic; that what organisation exists will be very loose and wouldn't be hobbled by bureaucracy. This is some nerd on a power trip because "I R TEST LEADOR HUEH HUEH HUEH". This is exactly how that elitist attitude found in so many other groups in every game begins. "That filthy peasant isn't certified in his Aurora, FIRE DA LAZORS! Now Timmy I hope you learned your lesson, sit back down behind the wheel of this Idris and don't move until commanded. The King has spoken and so shall it be!"

Though it would be fun to hear a kill command given and someone physically close to the Command Giver pulls out his 9 and busts a cap in his dome. "Cleanse that filth with fire! What are you doing with that gun? WHAT THE FUCK WHY DID YOU KILL ME!!??"
 

TheWoad

ADI Spai
Feb 15, 2015
108
298
1,710
RSI Handle
Woady McWoadface
I heard that the Admiral of some base somewhere overheard his... Senior-Firstclass-Private-Seaman-Ensign type guys talking about Star Citizen and how it was going to be a great getaway from day to day Army & Navy life, so he created ADI and forced everyone under his command to buy Star Citizen... so he could rule them FOREVER!!
One Admiral to rule them all. Wouldn't that be funny?

"Move these ships to that spot and kill the thing"
"Fuck you, you're not the boss of me"
"Petty Officer see me in my office IRL"

I have a theory: Montoya is actually Obama, WarrenPeace is actually the Queen of England and SeungRyul is... Kim Jong Il. It's a conspiracy I tell ya! That's why the SOTS 15 is late, because Monty AKA Obama is busy starting another war. BOOM politics and mind=blown!
 

Annitias

Minister of Propaganda
Staff member
Officer
Donor
Oct 5, 2014
1,013
1,449
2,500
RSI Handle
Annitias
One Admiral to rule them all. Wouldn't that be funny?

"Move these ships to that spot and kill the thing"
"Fuck you, you're not the boss of me"
"Petty Officer see me in my office IRL"

I have a theory: Montoya is actually Obama, WarrenPeace is actually the Queen of England and SeungRyul is... Kim Jong Il. It's a conspiracy I tell ya! That's why the SOTS 15 is late, because Monty AKA Obama is busy starting another war. BOOM politics and mind=blown!
At least I did not play the role of Kim. Eating that much and not bathing was starting to affect my sleep...
 

WarrenPeace

Space Marshal
Jul 17, 2014
4,209
8,451
2,920
RSI Handle
Shortspark
One Admiral to rule them all. Wouldn't that be funny?

"Move these ships to that spot and kill the thing"
"Fuck you, you're not the boss of me"
"Petty Officer see me in my office IRL"

I have a theory: Montoya is actually Obama, WarrenPeace is actually the Queen of England and SeungRyul is... Kim Jong Il. It's a conspiracy I tell ya! That's why the SOTS 15 is late, because Monty AKA Obama is busy starting another war. BOOM politics and mind=blown!
Would Her Royal Highness have time to shitpost this much? I think not. Now back to work, peasant.
 

Grimbli

Space Marshal
Jan 27, 2016
4,034
14,846
2,910
RSI Handle
Grimbli
Would Her Royal Highness have time to shitpost this much? I think not. Now back to work, peasant.
Everyone has time to shitpost that much. Cause it's shit and doesn't take long to post.

Besides, everyone knows the Queen makes her servants shitpost.
 

Blind Owl

Hallucinogenic Owl
Donor
Nov 27, 2015
20,913
73,955
3,160
RSI Handle
BlindOwl
One Admiral to rule them all. Wouldn't that be funny?

"Move these ships to that spot and kill the thing"
"Fuck you, you're not the boss of me"
"Petty Officer see me in my office IRL"

I have a theory: Montoya is actually Obama, WarrenPeace is actually the Queen of England and SeungRyul is... Kim Jong Il. It's a conspiracy I tell ya! That's why the SOTS 15 is late, because Monty AKA Obama is busy starting another war. BOOM politics and mind=blown!
At least I did not play the role of Kim. Eating that much and not bathing was starting to affect my sleep...
Would Her Royal Highness have time to shitpost this much? I think not. Now back to work, peasant.
I'm just sitting over here eating my crayons.
 
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