Depression and gaming

Vavrik

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Sep 19, 2017
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One of my kids struggles with suicide, he found an outlet though. He discovered he's good at public speaking about 2 years ago, and now gives recognition and intervention, motivation, and coping skill talks for suicide help org in Canada.
 

Jolly_Green_Giant

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One of my kids struggles with suicide, he found an outlet though. He discovered he's good at public speaking about 2 years ago, and now gives recognition and intervention, motivation, and coping skill talks for suicide help org in Canada.

That is awesome. I mean, how he ended up taking control and finding purpose. It's what I did in the Air Force, I volunteered to take up speaking to our squadron (~3-400 people in a theater). I was terrified to do it, but I figured if I could help someone by just letting them know people give a shit, it was the right thing to do. I'm sure you already are, but you should be very proud of your son :)


how is everyone doing?
I had my ups and downs, being diagnosed with bipolar and switching medication has helped me TREMENDOUSLY. I had a moment when I interviewed with SpaceX and turned them down and was in this really deep depressive state, I think I was just overstimulated because I had been doing some insane things the week before (boarding USN destroyers out in the middle of the ocean during rough seas to support a Submarine course). After a few weeks, they called me back and were like "hey we really like you and wish you would reconsider" and I just said screw how I was feeling and went for it. I start next week and move into my new place Friday.

My little sister is fighting alcoholism, as in it's just become a compulsion to her, an obsessive thought she can't shake and recently had a cry for help. I can't do much for her but offer her support. She's been going to her psychiatrist and AA meetings and has been doing really well. I took her to Disney World Friday and we had a great time. Thanks for asking @mromutt , now the question is, how are you?
 

mromutt

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Oct 14, 2014
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That is awesome. I mean, how he ended up taking control and finding purpose. It's what I did in the Air Force, I volunteered to take up speaking to our squadron (~3-400 people in a theater). I was terrified to do it, but I figured if I could help someone by just letting them know people give a shit, it was the right thing to do. I'm sure you already are, but you should be very proud of your son :slight_smile:




I had my ups and downs, being diagnosed with bipolar and switching medication has helped me TREMENDOUSLY. I had a moment when I interviewed with SpaceX and turned them down and was in this really deep depressive state, I think I was just overstimulated because I had been doing some insane things the week before (boarding USN destroyers out in the middle of the ocean during rough seas to support a Submarine course). After a few weeks, they called me back and were like "hey we really like you and wish you would reconsider" and I just said screw how I was feeling and went for it. I start next week and move into my new place Friday.

My little sister is fighting alcoholism, as in it's just become a compulsion to her, an obsessive thought she can't shake and recently had a cry for help. I can't do much for her but offer her support. She's been going to her psychiatrist and AA meetings and has been doing really well. I took her to Disney World Friday and we had a great time. Thanks for asking @mromutt , now the question is, how are you?
:O oh thats great you reconsidered the job, I always find just pushing yourself to do something in-spite of how you are feeling inside is one of the hardest things to do, even harder than pushing your body past physical breaking limits! As for myself, not great lately but even as bad as its been getting im managing. If theres one thing I am good at its holding onto that very last treat no mater what. Uncontrollable self preservation instinct I guess, ironic considering for over half my life (just shy of 2/3 of it now) I have had to live with those thoughts on an almost daily bases lol
 

Zapper Weisman

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When I was a kid I was bullied for almost 3 years straight with almost NO outside support and already had social issues and problems with emotion and impulse control (bio mom drank with me in the womb, thanks mom!). All this combined with other stuff and now I have PTSD and anxiety so bad it's difficult to leave the house some days. I am 39 now and have learned to deal with some of it, but it's still a daily, constant battle so I understand anxiety all too well.

Your post, to me, seems like it took courage and I appreciate that (so many people without anxiety claim to get it, but most really don't). Part of my anxiety is that I have a perfection compulsion. Gotta 100% that game or else there's no point. I love gaming but this sucks much of the fun out of it. That and people can be horribly toxic in online games so I have sort of avoided online games in more recent years. Star Citizen has, in my personal experience, a more positive community than many I've been involved with and that's part of what attracted me to it.

I have anxiety almost every time I post on any forum, thinking someone will rip into me for no reason. (i do say dumb things sometimes, though i try not to) Posting this is hard for me. Anyway, it would be great to play with people who get all this. Might make it easier.
 

Montoya

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I have anxiety almost every time I post on any forum, thinking someone will rip into me for no reason. (i do say dumb things sometimes, though i try not to) Posting this is hard for me. Anyway, it would be great to play with people who get all this. Might make it easier.
I suggest you keep posting and just accept that people are going to rip on you!

You would not believe the hate I get on youtube. People get really pissed off that I am supportive of Star Citizen, to the point that they threaten me!

It was very shocking at first, but after a while its just background noise!
 

Zapper Weisman

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I hear what you are saying, Montoya. I've been gaming online since the day I picked up my first 28.8 modem and it's never just become background noise to me. Sort of just builds on me until I have had enough and leave. Honestly I could not do what you do, putting yourself out there on YouTube like that. But I try, in my own ways.
 

Hero9012

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So, I don't ever talk about it, and I refuse to say or let someone tell me I have PTSD or that I suffer through depression. When my parents divorced I never complained to any of my siblings because they always came to me. I kinda kept that my entire life then I got into Law Enforcement and it got real but I was still the same dumb kid. Gaming helps with it, but my big thing is traveling. Traveling reminds me that life is beautiful and refreshes me. That being said, anytime we are flying our Aurora's into the sun. Hit me up.

But I also always have my phone or tablet with me, and I have discord or even skype. I'm always game for a video chat. We all know depression is real. We may not have met in real life but I love people and I'm always excited to make a new friend. Just message me on here if you ever need to talk!
 

AstroSam

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Mar 8, 2016
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I've just done something extremely stupid: bought myself an Idris, enjoyed it like a child opn Christmas Eve - and today I feel so extremely bad and want to keep banging my head against the wall.
Probably a normal process, psychologically speaking - but I feel extremely bad. Because of everything. Because my wife doesn't know. Because in the world people are suffering. Because of the huge amount of money. Because.....
I just want to run to CIG and give it back.
Do you know something like that? How do you deal with it?
 

O-Lefty

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Sep 12, 2016
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So I just found this thread today since it popped up to the recently active posts and all I have to say is that you're all welcome to join me in the game any time. I joined TEST to have fun with other people and luckily I have the opportunity to back the game for quite a few of the larger ships.

I only buy ships to share the Star Citizen experience with others, to have fun in the verse.

People have regularly been playing 3.3.6 live since it came out and any free time that I have is spent flying around with a group of TESTies.

If you see me, or any other group of TEST members on the Discord voice chat in the Squardon channels they are likely playing the game together and would welcome you to come along.

Stay safe out there, and see you in the verse.


o7
O-Lefty
 

Radegast74

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So I just found this thread today since it popped up to the recently active posts and all I have to say is that you're all welcome to join me in the game any time. I joined TEST to have fun with other people and luckily I have the opportunity to back the game for quite a few of the larger ships.

I only buy ships to share the Star Citizen experience with others, to have fun in the verse.

People have regularly been playing 3.3.6 live since it came out and any free time that I have is spent flying around with a group of TESTies.

If you see me, or any other group of TEST members on the Discord voice chat in the Squardon channels they are likely playing the game together and would welcome you to come along.

Stay safe out there, and see you in the verse.


o7
O-Lefty
Great suggestion! I want to game with people more, but usually (due to my anxiety) I "only want to play for an hour, max" and then because of that, "I really don't want to bother other people / interrupt their play if I'm only going to be on for a short time."

I just have to stop thinking like that...
 
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marctek

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I've just done something extremely stupid: bought myself an Idris, enjoyed it like a child opn Christmas Eve - and today I feel so extremely bad and want to keep banging my head against the wall.
Probably a normal process, psychologically speaking - but I feel extremely bad. Because of everything. Because my wife doesn't know. Because in the world people are suffering. Because of the huge amount of money. Because.....
I just want to run to CIG and give it back.
Do you know something like that? How do you deal with it?
Every time I look at my total spend I feel like that. I feel silly/bad most of the time a day or so after making a purchase for stuff that really isn't needed.
Sometimes I think it would just be better to drop it all and become a hermit in the woods. But that's not realistic and if you feel bad then donate some time to make up for the money you spent. It may make you feel better, but even if it doesn't make you feel better it will make the people you help feel better.
 
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Blind Owl

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I've just done something extremely stupid: bought myself an Idris, enjoyed it like a child opn Christmas Eve - and today I feel so extremely bad and want to keep banging my head against the wall.
Probably a normal process, psychologically speaking - but I feel extremely bad. Because of everything. Because my wife doesn't know. Because in the world people are suffering. Because of the huge amount of money. Because.....
I just want to run to CIG and give it back.
Do you know something like that? How do you deal with it?
Whelp, your either accept your actions and learn to live with it, or sell your account and restart. Frankly, I think I'd just learn to live with it. That's a beautiful ship. Did you get the new one with the laser?
 

Sutherland

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First of all thank you for this!

2nd please remember that in me and in the rest of the crew you have people to talk with and about ANYTHING! If you need to chat shoot a msg my way and I will be honored to help you in any way.

Gaming for me is a way to forget, and get over difficult days and situations. It is my "ME" time. My wife knows this and she is on board with it also.

Everyone needs that thing that pops a smile to their faces, in my case it is CrossFit (I am a coach ob my free time also!) and games. I have been looking for that perfect game to invest time and make it my own and I think I finally did. Along with a great crew here in TEST!

I HIGHLY recommend also reading this book: https://www.amazon.com/12-Rules-Life-Antidote-Chaos-ebook/dp/B01FPGY5T0/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1543593473&sr=8-2&keywords=jordan+peterson+12+rules+for+life / It is awesome and it gives you a lot of information and suggestions on how to deal with your highs and lows. Peterson is a very good communicator and even though I dont agree 100% with what he preaches, he offers wonderful insight and opinions about numerous subjects of interest.

Take care of yourself and keep doing the things you love! Always remembering to LIVE FIRST!

Pura vida!
 
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AstroSam

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@marctek @Blind Owl
Thanks a lot for answering me. Meanwhile I am well and back on track again. 👍🍻It's a classic known psychological effect - but I don't know how it is named/called anymore. I remember that my former employer, for whom I sold printers and copiers, had a separate department(!) for customers who had bought an expensive machine. Those customers often wanted to cancel their order shortly afterwards. Then it was a matter of reassuring these customers and encouraging them that they had done the right thing. Once this "emotional after-sales depth" has been crossed, everything is back to normal; everything's fine again.
That's exactly what I just experienced. In the meantime, I've gone through this emotional "after-sales"-however-it-you-name-it and I'm happy again (and I've got our homeless institution - and Wikipedia! - also donated money for the good cause aka for conscience 😊).
Now the feeling of joy about the ship is there again and the anticipation to be able to run through it SOON(TM) and to be able to push this jewel of all spaceships through the verse together with the community. 🍻@Blind Owl After I had calculated through the annual Patreon accounts, I noticed a small annual surplus, from which I bought the upgrade to the K - pewpew incoming! 😄
 

Radegast74

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@marctek @Blind Owl
Thanks a lot for answering me. Meanwhile I am well and back on track again. 👍🍻It's a classic known psychological effect - but I don't know how it is named/called anymore. I remember that my former employer, for whom I sold printers and copiers, had a separate department(!) for customers who had bought an expensive machine. Those customers often wanted to cancel their order shortly afterwards. Then it was a matter of reassuring these customers and encouraging them that they had done the right thing. Once this "emotional after-sales depth" has been crossed, everything is back to normal; everything's fine again.
That's exactly what I just experienced. In the meantime, I've gone through this emotional "after-sales"-however-it-you-name-it and I'm happy again (and I've got our homeless institution - and Wikipedia! - also donated money for the good cause aka for conscience 😊).
Now the feeling of joy about the ship is there again and the anticipation to be able to run through it SOON(TM) and to be able to push this jewel of all spaceships through the verse together with the community. 🍻@Blind Owl After I had calculated through the annual Patreon accounts, I noticed a small annual surplus, from which I bought the upgrade to the K - pewpew incoming! 😄
Right, the classic term for this is "buyer's remorse" and it is quite common in any large purchase ("large" can be relative). As you well know, sales people are keenly aware of it, and I'm impressed your company did something like that.

For myself, I find it hard to enjoy myself...I can't begin to describe the tortuous process I go through to justify spending $50 on a regular video game...

I don't think there is any "one-size fits all" solution to this, it depends on your regular amount of depression &/or anxiety, as well as other circumstances. For me, I tell myself, "Hey, I deserve to have fun now & then." I donate to some charities, and recognize that there will always be some suffering in the world, and some people who have more and some less.

With regards to Star Citizen...I really like CIG and want to support the game. They are working hard to deliver a product that we want, they listen to us, and everything I see from them shows a commitment to top quality. Along the lines of, "If you want to make an omelet, you have to break some eggs," if I want a great game, the money has to come from somewhere. On top of that, CIG is creating jobs for not just programmers, but artists and writers (how do I become a lore writer? lol), so my money is supporting a lot of people stay employed.
 

Blind Owl

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@marctek @Blind Owl
Thanks a lot for answering me. Meanwhile I am well and back on track again. 👍🍻It's a classic known psychological effect - but I don't know how it is named/called anymore. I remember that my former employer, for whom I sold printers and copiers, had a separate department(!) for customers who had bought an expensive machine. Those customers often wanted to cancel their order shortly afterwards. Then it was a matter of reassuring these customers and encouraging them that they had done the right thing. Once this "emotional after-sales depth" has been crossed, everything is back to normal; everything's fine again.
That's exactly what I just experienced. In the meantime, I've gone through this emotional "after-sales"-however-it-you-name-it and I'm happy again (and I've got our homeless institution - and Wikipedia! - also donated money for the good cause aka for conscience 😊).
Now the feeling of joy about the ship is there again and the anticipation to be able to run through it SOON(TM) and to be able to push this jewel of all spaceships through the verse together with the community. 🍻@Blind Owl After I had calculated through the annual Patreon accounts, I noticed a small annual surplus, from which I bought the upgrade to the K - pewpew incoming! 😄
Well it's good to hear that you've resolved your inner conflict my friend. And it's really good to hear that you got the K. I'm really looking forward to crash-landing into/onto it!
 
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