The truth is now known
- Thread starter Duhb
- Start date
We had a Roomba once. It cleaned. My wife called it Marge Roomba, or just Marge. Feel free to share this story with your wife @Duhb.
One day, my wife was walking toward the couch and crossed paths with Marge. She tripped trying to get around it. Well, see my wife is from Texas, so she swore up a storm that would have made a Navy bosun blush.
Not 5 minutes later, her cell phone rang, so she got up to get it. As she turned around with the phone to go back to the couch, Marge made a right hand turn right at that moment and got under her foot causing her to stumble again. The cell phone went flying, and landed in a cup of sweat tea on the coffee table. The phone did not survive the tea cup.
Marge eventually died of a voltage spike while she was recharging, but if you ever do get a Roomba, please make sure you treat it with respect - or suffer the consequences.
One day, my wife was walking toward the couch and crossed paths with Marge. She tripped trying to get around it. Well, see my wife is from Texas, so she swore up a storm that would have made a Navy bosun blush.
Not 5 minutes later, her cell phone rang, so she got up to get it. As she turned around with the phone to go back to the couch, Marge made a right hand turn right at that moment and got under her foot causing her to stumble again. The cell phone went flying, and landed in a cup of sweat tea on the coffee table. The phone did not survive the tea cup.
Marge eventually died of a voltage spike while she was recharging, but if you ever do get a Roomba, please make sure you treat it with respect - or suffer the consequences.
Well, all the Fans, Roombas and Toasters better be prepared for a fight.
I've got a pair of George Forman Grills as Boxing Gloves to deliver that knockout blow, a load of Nokia 3310's (original one) as indestructible chain mail, some extension chord Bolas and a tinfoil hat as thick as your thumb.
And not to forget my secret weapon, Henry Hoover - he never lets a bro down, even when his bag is full to bursting he's always ready to rumble.
Did the cup of tea survive the hit??
Perhaps your wife has shares in Ocedar.com and is worried that the robotic bastards will cause the company to loose value, thus lowering her retirement portfolio. Much concern.
I wish it was that simple, nope it’s small murder bots taking us out in our sleep... because reasons, honestly who knows why a robot will turn on you.
Somehow I just don’t think your treacherous roomda story will help my case...
Latest update
She says I’m an asshole because I shared her fear with hundreds of people online...
I pointed out there are over 15,000 test members, and anyone can look online at the forums.
She only looked at me and said in her slow quiet voice “god I hate you some days”
So me the dog, and my beer are barricaded under the computer desk. I got the boys down here to. If you don’t hear from me once a day you guys will know what happened... it’s been a good life...
Yes, we'll know what happened indeed. You bought a Roomba & are now living life free of burdens as it chases your kids around the house until they are ready for bed. Your wife got herself a bedroom "upgrade" to a place with nice padded walls & where there are no cleaning machines for miles other than the periodic floor buffer which only works while plugged into a wall socket. Which leaves you with the wallet & freedom to enjoy new ship jpegs as CIG releases them. Congrats!
Lol , if only... she is an ER nurse, they are all on her side. I stand no chance if padded walls are involved. Especially if they look at how much I have blown on jpeg ships. I know every morning she wakes up and has to decide if she will kill me in my sleep or make waffles. Thank the powers that be she loves waffles.
All I can say is LOL. But with two recent threads about autonomous robots in Test forums now, you can see people are thinking about this on some level. There is a group, https://www.stopkillerrobots.org Someone's wife might be interested. Not saying who's.
Wait... You don't die in your sleep and are made waffles every morning? And your hiding under your computer desk with beer? I think you sir might just be the luckiest man alive.
@Duhb
Sooo, do you have the privilege of helping out with hoovering and such?
If yes, then the answer might be more simple. She just doesn't want you to free of that privilege!
I asked my wife if we should get a Roomba, and the answer was ofc No, no way!
I asked why, and she made excuses starting with "We can't afford it" up to "it can't clean this type of floor"... So she tried to remain sensible. But ofc, the real reason was, that then I would be free to do whatever I want every Saturday afternoon for about an hour, which I always spend helping by hoovering and "being useful"...
To put it bluntly, if she feels like she has some degree of control over you, she won't ever give that up, especially not to a little round plastic puck.
Also, she's probably afraid that such a robot would prove that all that hard work she does keeping the place clean, can be done better by a piece of plastic junk made by child labourers for 1.49$ worth of materials...
Sooo, do you have the privilege of helping out with hoovering and such?
If yes, then the answer might be more simple. She just doesn't want you to free of that privilege!
I asked my wife if we should get a Roomba, and the answer was ofc No, no way!
I asked why, and she made excuses starting with "We can't afford it" up to "it can't clean this type of floor"... So she tried to remain sensible. But ofc, the real reason was, that then I would be free to do whatever I want every Saturday afternoon for about an hour, which I always spend helping by hoovering and "being useful"...
To put it bluntly, if she feels like she has some degree of control over you, she won't ever give that up, especially not to a little round plastic puck.
Also, she's probably afraid that such a robot would prove that all that hard work she does keeping the place clean, can be done better by a piece of plastic junk made by child labourers for 1.49$ worth of materials...
I see the Roomba hasn't quite perfected it's pentagram drawing skills. Can it even lit the candles?
Great now they have gotten the demon summoning update...
Personally, and please don't take this the wrong way, I prefer not to consort those of the robot race. Everybody thinks it's cool to hire one as a domestic, but you never know what they are thinking. They don't look like us, they don't think like us and they don't even speak the same language as us unless they are being forced to talk to us as part of their tasks. You think that when Siri and Alexa get together they speak in a normal Human language? No, I'm betting they talk that machine code gobbledygook all them silicon-based lifeforms talk when we aren't lookin'. No sir, no sir, not in my home, not in my neighborhood, not in my country! Next thing ya know, one of them will be trying to marry into a Human family.
Oh, crap, I'm a racist.
Oh, crap, I'm a racist.
This is exactly the reason I have come to this corner of the internet and squatted... I’m all moist eyed looking upon you all thinking, these are my peoples
While I do love delicious waffles, there might be another reason she chooses the waffles. I'm rather sure that she enjoys the taste of real maple syrup than the cheap fake syrup that she might get in prison for killing you. In which case, you might also want to thank the wonderful Canadians for growing the best trees that produce that delicious nectar of the Northern gods.
Also, she might be holding out against the Roomba until you can manage to get the upgraded model.
Her name is Rosie.
My other half has me doing the dishwasher, so even with an automaton doing the actual work, I have to supervise it.
I have found out I am not supervisor material, I am on a 25% success level this year for actually performing the task. Thats one week in every 4, so basically whenever we start using the dessert forks (you use those as dinner forks before running out entirely).
Imagine all the work you'd have to go through looking after a Roomba - Feeding, cleaning out its dump-box, and lets not forget: the Roomba isn't going to clean itself so it's not like you are out of the woods in regards to actually cleaning, it just moves from the relatively 2D carpet to the extremely 3D Automaton. How do you clean a Roomba? A Roomba-Rooomba?
And then who cleans the Roomba-Roomba? Not the Roomba because it can only clean the floor and not the Roomba-Roomba because it can only clean Roombas. So you'd need a Roomba-Roomba-Roomba.
Of course, if you are getting a Roomba-Roomba-Roomba remember to spend the extra $3000 for the upgrade to the self-cleaning model, or you'll need a Roomba-Roomba-Roomba-Roomba which don't have a self-clean upgrade option and have to be hand-washed with chamois and de-ionised water. Doing this, though, invalidates the warranty unless you have been on the 14 day correspondence course of Roomba-Roomba-Roomba-Roomba cleaning competency at just $300 (It validates your units warranty, so you can't then become a traveling Roomba-Roomba-Roomba-Roomba cleaner without the risk of invalidating everyones warranties.)
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Technophobe! Some of my closest friends have been mechanicals... My car, for one.
I've seen people getting a cold because they left a fan on in their room at night... but dying because of it??
I guess that myth is as old as the times when people thought of simple diseases as demonic possessions and evil spirits and shit...
I guess that myth is as old as the times when people thought of simple diseases as demonic possessions and evil spirits and shit...
Beerjerker
Grand Admiral
The dogs know.
Once the cats become mounted cavalry, we're all doomed.
Once the cats become mounted cavalry, we're all doomed.