Finally a way for Montoya to lose that beer belly

[Montoya]

A mate and children? What is that, some kind of sim game on facebook? Sounds boring.

Its a bit of a grind.

You need to constantly take care of the kids, we are talking feeding, bathing, put them to bed.

Once you have it figured out, its pretty easy.

One of the funniest hacks is if you clean the stove and scrub the showers, the wife initiates sex, its hilarious!

 

[Blind Owl]

The way back down is even harder now that I'm getting older.

Tell me about it. I'm still trying to loose the pregnancy weight . . .and my kid is almost 3.

Also, I'm a man.

 

[Montoya]

Tell me about it. I'm still trying to loose the pregnancy weight . . .and my kid is almost 3.

Also, I'm a man.

Your underwear should always be larger than your wife's.

As a husband, you need to ensure that you get enough calories to maintain a larger ass, it was in your marriage vows.

 

[Blind Owl]

Your underwear should always be larger than your wife's.

As a husband, you need to ensure that you get enough calories to maintain a larger ass, it was in your marriage vows.

No worries there. I've put a lot of blood, sweat and beer into this ass! It's bought and paid for, and I'm taking it with me when I go.

 

[Printimus]

BEER BELLY ALL THE THINGS!

 

[marcsand2]

https://www.amazon.com/Cubii-Ellipt...f-ec7b-4ba4-9a5e-093edb3319b6&pf_rd_i=desktop

Wow, that are expensive rudder pedals!!!! For the same amount you can get a MFG Crosswinds

I have no need for six pack abs

I have a need for a six pack behind my abs!!!!!

 

[Bambooza]

Its a bit of a grind.

You need to constantly take care of the kids, we are talking feeding, bathing, put them to bed.

Once you have it figured out, its pretty easy.

One of the funniest hacks is if you clean the stove and scrub the showers, the wife initiates sex, its hilarious!

Don't forget the jokes you get to tell with other parents that those who are not part of the club would either be disgusted or not get.

 

[Liquor_and_ores]

 

[Vavrik]

Guess that makes me kinda sexy. :astonished:

 

[Montoya]

Don't forget the jokes you get to tell with other parents that those who are not part of the club would either be disgusted or not get.

Yeah, like the time I changed a poopy diaper and my thumb got right into the poop! Im talking all the way down past the knuckle!

And there was some corn in the poop!

It was hilarious! (all parents laugh!)

 

[Vavrik]

Yeah, like the time I changed a poopy diaper and my thumb got right into the poop! Im talking all the way down past the knuckle!

And there was some corn in the poop!

It was hilarious! (all parents laugh!)

Oh yeah. Bet that didn't happen just once. My oldest had a jet vomit reflex until he was 8. Once while playing around with him, he threw up in my face. I mean eyes, nose, mouth...shirt, everything. If i recall correctly there was corn in that too.

 

[Achoobert]

Hahaha, reading this thread I feel validated in my plan to stay single forever.

I'm trying to get fit, so I try to avoid alcohol because it has so many calories.
So every three weeks or so when I do have a single beer it's SUPER EFFECTIVE.

 

[Bambooza]

Yeah, like the time I changed a poopy diaper and my thumb got right into the poop! Im talking all the way down past the knuckle!

And there was some corn in the poop!

It was hilarious! (all parents laugh!)

Poop and fart jokes take on whole new meaning.

 

[Blind Owl]

Yeah, like the time I changed a poopy diaper and my thumb got right into the poop! Im talking all the way down past the knuckle!

And there was some corn in the poop!

It was hilarious! (all parents laugh!)

Hahaha, it's funny how immune you become to bodily fluids/solids as a parent.

 

[NaffNaffBobFace]

*takes notes*

Scrub the shower

*takes notes*

Wear big underpants

*takes notes*

jet vomit reflex

*takes notes*

'Dad bod' is a thing...

Great - I got married Friday before last, this stuff is like an instruction manual! :)

 

[SullyQuindarius]

Bleh. I'm a skinny stick. For now.

 

[Blind Owl]

Great - I got married Friday before last, this stuff is like an instruction manual! :slight_smile:

You got MARRIED?!? How did we not know?
Congrats my friend!

 

[NaffNaffBobFace]

You got MARRIED?!? How did we not know?
Congrats my friend!

Thanks, much appreciated :)

I did stop referring my lovely lady as the "Wife-To-Be" and started saying "Wife" on the forum - I was hoping the wedding photos would be back quickly so I could do as @Printimus did announcing with a wedding picture but we have been advised to expect it to take 'weeks' for them to come so I kinda got bored of waiting :)

 

[Printimus]

Thanks, much appreciated :slight_smile:

I did stop referring my lovely lady as the "Wife-To-Be" and started saying "Wife" on the forum - I was hoping the wedding photos would be back quickly so I could do as @Printimus did announcing with a wedding picture but we have been advised to expect it to take 'weeks' for them to come so I kinda got bored of waiting :slight_smile:

Wedding photographers are crooks. Thats why I got my family members to just do photos for us, so we get them right away.

Also, congrats man! Doesnt feel much different, does it?

 

[marcsand2]

Great - I got married Friday before last

Congratulations :beers::beers::beers:

this stuff is like an instruction manual! :slight_smile:

You didn't read the manual before getting married :thinking::smile: